The House by the Church-YardLe Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
General
The House by the Church-Yard
Le Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
Country life -- Ireland -- Fiction; Ireland -- Social life and customs -- 18th century -- Fiction
Toole and Devereux drew back a little into the shadow of the opposite
buildings, for while they were waiting, a dusky apparition, supposed to
be old Drought in his night-shirt, appeared at that gentleman's windows,
saluting the ambassadors with mop and moe, in a very threatening and
energetic way. Just as this demonstration subsided, the hall door opened
wide--and indeed was left so--while our friend Loftus, in a wonderful
tattered old silk coat, that looked quite indescribable by moonlight,
the torn linings hanging down in loops inside the skirts, pale and
discoloured, like the shreds of banners in a cathedral; his shirt loose
at the neck, his breeches unbuttoned at the knees, and a gigantic,
misshapen, and mouldy pair of slippers clinging and clattering about his
feet, came down the steps, his light, round little eyes and queer, quiet
face peering at them into the shade, and a smokified volume of divinity
tucked under his arm, with his finger between the leaves to keep the
place.
When Devereux saw him approaching, the whole thing--mission, service,
man, and all--struck him in so absurd a point of view, that he burst out
into an explosion of laughter, which only grew more vehement and
uproarious the more earnestly and imploringly Toole tried to quiet him,
pointing up with both hands, and all his fingers extended, to the
windows of the sleeping townsfolk, and making horrible grimaces, shrugs,
and ogles. But the young gentleman was not in the habit of denying
himself innocent indulgences, and shaking himself loose of Toole, he
walked down the dark side of the street in peals of laughter, making,
ever and anon, little breathless remarks to himself, which his colleague
could not hear, but which seemed to have the effect of setting him off
again into new hemi-demi-semiquavers and roars of laughter, and left the
doctor to himself, to conduct the negociation with Loftus.
'Well?' said Devereux, by this time recovering breath, as the little
doctor, looking very red and glum, strutted up to him along the shady
pavement.
'Well? _well?_--oh, ay, _very_ well, to be sure. I'd like to know what
the plague we're to do now,' grumbled Toole.
'Your precious armour-bearer refuses to act then?' asked Devereux.
'To be sure he does. He sees _you_ walking down the street, ready to die
o' laughing--at _nothing_, by Jove!' swore Toole, in deep disgust;
'and--and--och! hang it! it's all a confounded pack o' nonsense. Sir, if
you could not keep grave for five minutes, you ought not to have come at
all. But what need _I_ care? It's Nutter's affair, not mine.'
'And well for him we failed. Did you ever see such a fish? He'd have
shot himself or Nutter, to a certainty. But there's a chance yet: we
forgot the Nightingale Club; they're still in the Phoenix.'
'Pooh, Sir! they're all tailors and green-grocers,' said Toole, in high
dudgeon.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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