The House by the Church-YardLe Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
General
The House by the Church-Yard
Le Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
Country life -- Ireland -- Fiction; Ireland -- Social life and customs -- 18th century -- Fiction
(A low whistle from his reverence). 'That's a boy that comes from a
fighting county--Galway. I wish you saw them at an election time. Why,
there's no end of divarsion--the divarsion of _stopping_ them, of
course, I mean (observing a sudden alteration in Loftus's countenance).
An' _you_, av coorse, want to stop it? And so, av coorse, do I, my dear.
Well, then, wait a bit, now--we must have our eyes open. Don't be in a
hurry--let us be harrumless as sarpints, but _wise_ as doves. Now, 'tis
a fine thing, no doubt, to put an end to a jewel by active
intherfarence, though I have known cases, my dear child, where
suppressing a simple jewel has been the cause of half a dozen breaking
out afterwards in the same neighbourhood, and on the very same quarrel,
d'ye mind--though, of coorse, that's no reason here or there, my dear
boy! But take it that a jewel is breaking down and coming to the ground
of itself (here a hugely cunning wink), in an aisy, natural,
accommodating way, the only effect of intherfarence is to bolster it up,
d'ye see, so just considher how things are, my dear. Lave it all to me,
and mind my words, it _can't_ take place without a second. The officers
have refused, so has Toole, _you_ won't undertake it, and it's too late
to go into town. I defy it to come to anything. Jest be said be me, Dan
Loftus, and let sleeping dogs lie. Here I am, an old experienced
observer, that's up to their tricks, with my eye upon them. Go you to
bed--lave them to me--and they're checkmated without so much as seeing
how we bring it to pass.'
Dan hesitated.
'Arrah! go to your bed, Dan Loftus, dear. It's past eleven
o'clock--they're nonplussed already; and lave _me_--me that understands
it--to manage the rest.'
'Well, Sir, I do confide it altogether to you. I know I might, through
ignorance, do a mischief.'
And so they bid a mutual good-night, and Loftus scaled his garret stair
and snuffed his candle, and plunged again into the business of two
thousand years ago.
'Here's a purty business,' says the priest, extending both his palms,
with a face of warlike importance, and shutting the door behind him
with what he called 'a cow's kick;' 'a jewel, my dear Pat, no less;
bloody work I'm afeared.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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