The Humour and Pathos of Anglo-Indian Life: Extracts from his brother's note-book, made by Dr. TicklemoreMayer, J. E.
General
The Humour and Pathos of Anglo-Indian Life: Extracts from his brother's note-book, made by Dr. Ticklemore
Mayer, J. E.
British -- India; India -- Social life and customs
J., one of the three men who had been chief jokers, then said, 'But,
Doctor, you ought to have known that if we had really suspected that
there was anything of the white feather connected with your not joining
us in our expeditions, we shouldn't have thought you worth poking fun
at, and should never have cared whether you went out with us or not.'
'Pray say no more; I am convinced that I was hasty, and in the wrong to
get so angry!' 'Now,' said the Colonel, 'after what the Doctor has
admitted, let's say no more on the subject.' 'One word more, if you
please, Colonel; I wish to prove to all my friends here that they did
not judge me wrongly. The very next time you go after cheetah or tiger,
I will go with you' (a shout of approval). 'Well said, Doctor!' 'I will
lend you a rifle,' said W. 'Or I, or I,' said M. and S. 'And I, if I had
one to lend,' said B., 'but as I haven't, all I can offer is a pith-hat
with a brim as large as an umbrella, and if that doesn't of itself
frighten the tiger, he must be a peculiarly unapprehensive beast; and
I'll venture a trifle that the Doctor does more execution with the hat
than he would with the gun, although he is such a peppery gentleman.'
'The pepper is all out of me now, B., and you may say whatever you like;
and I would accept your redoubtable pith-hat, had I not one of my own.
Besides that, I couldn't think of depriving you of such a powerful
weapon, so if you mount your hat and have your rifle in your hand, you
will be doubly armed, and will no doubt do double execution.' 'By Jove!'
said B., 'the pepper isn't all out of you yet.' 'But you will take my
rifle?' said W.; 'if you bring the double-sights in a line with the
object, you can't miss him.' 'Best thanks, W., but as I am altogether
unpractised, I shall go out without a gun or weapon of any kind, not
even my friend B.'s pith-hat.' 'On my word, Doctor,' said the Colonel,
'that's the wisest resolution you could come to; it will be better for
you to become a little familiar with the rifle before you go after
tigers or cheetahs.' 'Besides,' said B., 'who knows but the Doctor might
take a sly pot at one of us, and wing the unlucky individual for the
sake of a little surgical practice; he's had none since he's been with
us.' 'Well, B., that blow might have been effective if it had not been
somewhat below the belt; at all events, it was not so bad as your shot
at the pariah dog that you missed this morning, and that M. rolled over
immediately after.' There was a general laugh at B.'s expense. 'And,
pray, how did you know that?' said B. 'I only saw it, that's all!' 'Why,
you rode past three or four minutes before we fired; you must have had
eyes behind to see that.' 'Oh, B., if that's the style (stile), I shall
leave you to get over it as you can; the present attempt is rather lame,
and I wish you a steadier hand when you come to make close acquaintance
with the striped or spotted coats, unless you've got M. behind you to
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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