When the black man had gone out into the night, and the patient little
by little recovered from the struggle and felt free once more, it
occurred to me that the priest in his violence and coarseness was
horribly right. A bad priest? No, a good priest, who spoke strictly
according to his conscience and belief, and tried to apply his religion
simply, such as it was, without hypocritical concessions. Ignorant,
clumsy, gross--yes, but honest and logical even in his fearful attempt.
In the half-hour that I had listened to him, he had tried by all the
means that religion uses and recommends to follow his calling of making
converts and giving absolution. He had said everything that a priest
cannot help saying. Every dogma had come out clearly and definitely
from the mouth of this rough, common hewer of wood and drawer of water
for his religion. If the sick man was right, so was the priest.
. . . . .
What was that thing near the bed, that thing which loomed so high and
did not stir and had not been there a moment before? It stood between
me and the leaping flame of the candle placed near the sick man.
I accidentally made a little noise in leaning against the wall, and
very slowly the thing turned a face toward me with a frightened look on
it that frightened me.
I knew that head. Was it not the landlord himself, a man with peculiar
ways, whom we seldom saw?
He had been walking up and down the hall, waiting for the sick man to
be left alone. And now he was standing beside him as he lay in bed
either asleep or helpless from weakness.
He stretched his hand out toward a bag. In doing so, he kept his eyes
on the dying man, so that his hand missed the bag twice.
There was a creaking on the floor above, and both the man and I
trembled. A door slammed. He rose as if to keep back an exclamation.
He opened the bag slowly, and I, no longer myself, I was afraid that he
would not have time.
He drew a package out of the bag. It made a slight sound. When he saw
the roll of banknotes in his hand, I observed the extraordinary gleam
on his face. All the sentiments of love were there, adoration,
mysticism, and also brutal love, a sort of supernatural ecstasy and the
gross satisfaction that was already tasting immediate joys. Yes, all
the loves impressed themselves for a moment on the profound humanity of
this thief's face.
Some one was waiting for him behind the half-open door. I saw an arm
beckoning to him.
He went out on tiptoe, first slowly, then quickly.
I am an honest man, and yet I held my breath along with him. I
/understood/ him. There is no use finding excuses for myself. With a
horror and a joy akin to his, I was an accomplice in his robbery.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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