The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and FantasiesZangwill, Israel
General
The King of Schnorrers: Grotesques and Fantasies
Zangwill, Israel
Humorous stories; Jewish fiction; Jews -- England -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
statutes to cement, not thus to disintegrate, the community. 'Twas a
tactless tyranny, this of the Mahamad, an inelastic administration of
a cast-iron codex wrought "in good King Charles's golden days," when
the colony of Dutch-Spanish exiles was as a camp in enemies' country,
in need of military _régime_; and it co-operated with the attractions
of an unhampered "Christian" career in driving many a brilliant family
beyond the gates of the Ghetto, and into the pages of Debrett. Athens
is always a dangerous rival to Sparta.
But the Mahamad itself moved strictly in the grooves of prescription.
That legalistic instinct of the Hebrew, which had evolved the most
gigantic and minute code of conduct in the world, had beguiled these
latter-day Jews into super-adding to it a local legislation that grew
into two hundred pages of Portuguese--an intertangled network of
_Ascamot_ or regulations, providing for every contingency of Synagogue
politics, from the quarrels of members for the best seats down to the
dimensions of their graves in the _Carreira_, from the distribution of
"good deeds" among the rich to the distribution of Passover Cakes
among the poor. If the wheels and pulleys of the communal life moved
"by permission of the Mahamad," the Mahamad moved by permission of the
_Ascamot_.
The Solemn Council was met--"in complete Mahamad." Even the Chief of
the Elders was present, by virtue of his privilege, making a sixth;
not to count the Chancellor or Secretary, who sat flutteringly
fingering the Portuguese Minute Book on the right of the President. He
was a little man, an odd medley of pomp and bluster, with a
snuff-smeared upper lip, and a nose that had dipped in the wine when
it was red. He had a grandiose sense of his own importance, but it was
a pride that had its roots in humility, for he felt himself great
because he was the servant of greatness. He lived "by permission of
the Mahamad." As an official he was theoretically inaccessible. If you
approached him on a matter he would put out his palms deprecatingly
and pant, "I must consult the Mahamad." It was said of him that he had
once been asked the time, and that he had automatically panted, "I
must consult the Mahamad." This consultation was the merest form; in
practice the Secretary had more influence than the Chief Rabbi, who
was not allowed to recommend an applicant for charity, for the quaint
reason that the respect entertained for him might unduly prejudice the
Council in favour of his candidate. As no gentleman of the Mahamad
could possibly master the statutes in his year of office, especially
as only a rare member understood the Portuguese in which they had been
ultimately couched, the Secretary was invariably referred to, for he
was permanent, full of saws and precedents, and so he interpreted the
law with impartial inaccuracy--"by permission of the Mahamad." In his
heart of hearts he believed that the sun rose and the rain fell--"by
permission of the Mahamad."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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