When Sunday came, it was, indeed, a day of finery, which all my
[v]sumptuary edicts could not restrain. How well soever I fancied my
lectures against pride had conquered the vanity of my daughters, yet I
still found them secretly attached to all their former finery; they
still loved laces, ribbons, and bugles, and my wife herself retained a
passion for her crimson [v]paduasoy, because I formerly happened to say
it became her.
The first Sunday, in particular, their behavior served to mortify me. I
had desired my girls the preceding night to be dressed early the next
day, for I always loved to be at church a good while before the rest of
the congregation. They punctually obeyed my directions; but when we were
to assemble in the morning at breakfast, down came my wife and
daughters, dressed out in all their former splendor--their hair
plastered up with [v]pomatum, their faces [v]patched to taste, their
trains bundled up in a heap behind and rustling at every motion. I could
not help smiling at their vanity, particularly that of my wife, from
whom I expected more discretion. In this [v]exigence, therefore, my only
resource was to order my son, with an important air, to call our coach.
The girls were amazed at the command, but I repeated it, with more
solemnity than before.
"Surely, you jest!" cried my wife. "We can walk perfectly well; we want
no coach to carry us now."
"You mistake, child," returned I; "we do want a coach, for if we walk
to church in this trim, the very children in the parish will hoot after
us."
"Indeed!" replied my wife. "I always imagined that my Charles was fond
of seeing his children neat and handsome about him."
"You may be as neat as you please," interrupted I, "and I shall love you
the better for it; but all this is not neatness, but frippery. These
rufflings and pinkings and patchings will only make us hated by all the
wives of our neighbors. No, my children," continued I, more gravely,
"those gowns must be altered into something of a plainer cut, for finery
is very unbecoming in us who want the means of [v]decency."
This remonstrance had the proper effect. They went with great composure,
that very instant, to change their dress; and the next day I had the
satisfaction of finding my daughters, at their own request, employed in
cutting up their trains into Sunday waist-coats for Dick and Bill, the
two little ones; and, what was still more satisfactory, the gowns seemed
improved by this [v]curtailing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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