The Memoirs of Jacques Casanova de Seingalt, 1725-1798. Volume 05: Milan and MantuaCasanova, Giacomo
History
The Memoirs of Jacques Casanova de Seingalt, 1725-1798. Volume 05: Milan and Mantua
Casanova, Giacomo
Casanova, Giacomo, 1725-1798; Europe -- History -- 18th century -- Biography
"It is not an order that I gave him; I have no right to do so, and I
could not so far forget myself; it is only a prayer I addressed to him, a
service which circumstances have compelled me to claim at his hands, and
as he has no right to refuse me, I never entertained any doubt of his
granting my command. As far as you are concerned, it is certain that I
should have addressed the same prayer to you, if I had thought that you
had any views about me. You have given me some marks of your friendship,
but you must understand that if, under the circumstances, I am likely to
be injured by the kind attentions of the captain, yours would injure me
much more. If you have any friendship for me, you would have felt all
that."
"As you know that I entertain great friendship for you, you cannot
possibly suppose that I would leave you alone, without money, without
resources in the middle of a city where you cannot even make yourself
understood. Do you think that a man who feels for you the most tender
affection can abandon you when he has been fortunate enough to make your
acquaintance, when he is aware of the sad position in which you are
placed? If you think such a thing possible, you must have a very false
idea of friendship, and should such a man grant your request, he would
only prove that he is not your friend."
"I am certain that the captain is my friend; yet you have heard him, he
will obey me, and forget me."
"I do not know what sort of affection that honest man feels for you, or
how far he can rely upon the control he may have over himself, but I know
that if he can grant you what you have asked from him, his friendship
must be of a nature very different from mine, for I am bound to tell you
it is not only impossible for me to afford you willingly the strange
gratification of abandoning you in your position, but even that, if I go
to Parma, you could not possibly carry out your wishes, because I love
you so passionately that you must promise to be mine, or I must remain
here. In that case you must go to Parma alone with the captain, for I
feel that, if I accompanied you any further, I should soon be the most
wretched of men. I could not bear to see you with another lover, with a
husband, not even in the midst of your family; in fact, I would fain see
you and live with you forever. Let me tell you, lovely Henriette, that if
it is possible for a Frenchman to forget, an Italian cannot do it, at
least if I judge from my own feelings. I have made up my mind, you must
be good enough to decide now, and to tell me whether I am to accompany
you or to remain here. Answer yes or no; if I remain here it is all over.
I shall leave for Naples to-morrow, and I know I shall be cured in time
of the mad passion I feel for you, but if you tell me that I can
accompany you to Parma, you must promise me that your heart will forever
belong to me alone. I must be the only one to possess you, but I am ready
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