Oh, neighbours! what had I to do for to marry? My wife she drinks posset and wine o' Canary; And ca's me a niggardly, thrawn-gabbit cairly. O gin my wife wad drink hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad drink hooly and fairly! She sups, wi' her kimmers, on dainties enow, Aye bowing, and smirking, and wiping her mou'; While I sit aside, and am helpit but sparely. O gin my wife wad feast hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad feast hooly and fairly! To fairs, and to bridals, and preachings an' a', She gangs sae light-headed, and buskit sae braw, In ribbons and mantuas, that gar me gae barely. O gin my wife wad spend hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad spend hooly and fairly! I' the kirk sic commotion last Sabbath she made, Wi' babs o' red roses, and breast-knots o'erlaid; The dominie stickit the psalm very nearly. O gin my wife wad dress hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad dress hooly and fairly! She 's warring and flyting frae mornin' till e'en, And if ye gainsay her, her een glower sae keen; Then tongue, neive, and cudgel, she 'll lay on me sairly. O gin my wife wad strike hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad strike hooly and fairly! When tired wi' her cantrips, she lies in her bed-- The wark a' negleckit, the chalmer unred-- While a' our gude neighbours are stirring sae early. O gin my wife wad wark timely and fairly! Timely and fairly, timely and fairly; O gin my wife wad wark timely and fairly! A word o' gude counsel or grace she 'll hear none; She bandies the elders, and mocks at Mess John; While back in his teeth his own text she flings sairly. O gin my wife wad speak hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; O gin my wife wad speak hooly and fairly! I wish I were single, I wish I were freed; I wish I were doited, I wish I were dead; Or she in the mouls, to dement me nae mairly. What does it 'vail to cry, Hooly and fairly! Hooly and fairly, hooly and fairly; Wasting my health to cry, Hooly and fairly. [31] The style of this song and the chorus are borrowed from "The Drucken Wife o' Gallowa'," a song which first appeared in the "Charmer," a collection of songs, published at Edinburgh in 1751, but the authorship of which is unknown. THE WEARY PUND O' TOW. A young gudewife is in my house, And thrifty means to be, But aye she 's runnin' to the town Some ferlie there to see. The weary pund, the weary pund, the weary pund o' tow, I soothly think, ere it be spun, I 'll wear a lyart pow.