Yes, he’s far gone: and yet some pity fix; The English laws forbid to punish lunatics. [Illustration] FOOTNOTES: [55] The ruffian of the streets, in the 18th century. [Illustration: EPILOGUE TO THE COMEDY OF “SHE STOOPS TO CONQUER.”] _Spoken by Mrs. Bulkley, in the character of Miss Hardcastle._ Well! having STOOPED TO CONQUER with success, And gain’d a husband without aid from dress,-- Still, as a barmaid, I could wish it too, As I have conquer’d him, to conquer you: And let me say, for all your resolution, That pretty barmaids have done execution. Our life is all a play, compos’d to please; “We have our _exits_ and our _entrances_.” The first Act shows the simple country maid, Harmless and young, of everything afraid; Blushes when hir’d, and with unmeaning action: “I hopes as how to give you satisfaction.” Her second Act displays a livelier scene,-- The unblushing barmaid of a country inn, Who whisks about the house, at market caters, Talks loud, coquets the guests, and scolds the waiters. Next, the scene shifts to town, and there she soars, The chop-house toast of ogling _connoisseurs_. On ’squires and cits she there displays her arts, And on the gridiron broils her lovers’ hearts-- And as she smiles, her triumphs to complete, Even common-councilmen forget to eat. The fourth Act shows her wedded to the ’squire, And Madam now begins to hold it higher; Pretends to taste, at operas cries _caro_, And quits her _Nancy Dawson_ for _Che faro_; Dotes upon dancing, and in all her pride, Swims round the room, the Heinel of Cheapside Ogles and leers with artificial skill, Till, having lost in age the power to kill, She sits all night at cards, and ogles at spadille. Such, through our lives the _eventful history_-- The fifth and last Act still remains for me: The barmaid now for your protection prays, Turns female barrister, and pleads for Bayes.[56] [Illustration] FOOTNOTES: [56] The name of “Bayes,” which Buckingham (1671) bestowed upon Dryden, became a synonyme for a dramatic critic. [Illustration: EPILOGUE TO “THE GOOD-NATURED MAN.”[57]]