There is nothing wrong with this advice in and of itself. Anybody with a modicum of experience knows that variety is one of the finest spices of love. The books generally, if not always, neglect to say, however, that such variety is only relevant to a sex life in which the partners have no deep-seated sexual problem to start with. By omitting that piece of information these books give the strong tacit impression that variety of sexual position will solve an already well-established sexual difficulty. The desperate woman will seize upon these implications as upon a panacea for her ills. I must state here that all of the innumerable positions of love described in the Hindu Kamasutra (from which so many of our marriage manuals, incidentally, derive much of their information) will not undo a clitoral fixation. A woman is asking for just one more emotional defeat if she insists that a solution lies in this direction. * * * * * We have now seen the three things that make frigidity possible in women. I will repeat them briefly so that you’ll remember them later. The first is the fact that the female orgasm is not a biological necessity in woman as it is in man. The race can and does go on if women fail to have full sexual satisfaction. This strongly suggests why the female orgasm is so susceptible to psychological influences of an adverse kind. The second is the fact that motherhood calls for tremendous psychological and sometimes physical sacrifices; it means that a woman has to reverse the natural law of self-preservation and put her children’s welfare ahead of her own. This is deeply frightening to some women and, unless they are properly educated, can cause them to fear their feminine sexual impulses to the point where they are unable to enjoy love-making. The third reason is that women have, in effect, two organs of gratification, the clitoris and the vagina. Clitoral orgasm is immature, evades true feminine sexuality, and is considered a form of frigidity. However, millions of women find this earlier method of gratification so satisfying that they are not motivated to move up to the mature level. Chapter 8 THE GROWTH OF LOVE In medical school one of our courses included the study of the psychological stages of development man goes through from infancy to maturity. It also included the various pitfalls people encounter during these stages, the biological and psychological experiences that can prevent them from reaching psychological maturity. During one class in which we reviewed the psychological hazards of adolescence a very intelligent student raised his hand and was recognized by the professor. “How does anybody _ever_ really grow up?” this student asked.