"Then you would make me wretched for the sake of the world, even if
what you say of my position and your own were true? And it is not. Is
your genius nothing? Is your fame nothing? I speak now as reasonably
as yourself; not as a man who holds you peerless, far removed above
all the world, but as one discussing a question open to argument. What
am I in comparison to the men who would be proud to offer you rank and
wealth? What have I to give you that others could not give a
thousandfold?"
"You give me all I value, all I care for," she said; "but I must not
take it. You must not, you shall not, deceive yourself. My genius, as
you call it, my fame, are real things in their way and in their
sphere, but they are not of any account in yours. Ask your friend Lord
Sandilands; he is a kind friend to me also, and a man who knows the
world thoroughly; and he will tell you I am right."
"No, he won't!" said Miles triumphantly, "No, he won't! He will tell
_you_, on the contrary, that you are quite wrong; he will tell you
that he knows I love you, and have dared to hope, to believe that you
love me. He will tell you that I have told him what is my dearest
hope, and that he shares it; and more, Grace, more than that, he will
tell you that he came here with me to-day on purpose that I might
learn my fate, and be no longer in suspense; and that he is on duty at
this moment, keeping the old ladies in talk, just to give me this
precious opportunity. Now, where are all your arguments? where are my
wise friends? where is this terrible world to whom we are to be
sacrificed? You have nothing more to say, Grace; your 'never, never,
never!' cannot hurt me any more."
For one brief moment he triumphed. For one moment his arm was around
her, and his lips, were pressed to hers. But the next she had started
from his embrace, and stood pale and breathless before him.
"Is this really true?" she said; "does Lord Sandilands approve?" She
asked him only to gain a moment's time for thought; she was terribly
disconcerted by this complication, it increased her difficulties
immensely. But Miles saw in the question only a symptom of yielding,
only a proof of his victory.
"Yes; yes," he said eagerly, "it is true; it is indeed! He is the only
real friend I have in the world; the only man whose opinion I care
for, and he is on my side. Now, Grace, you must yield; you cannot
refuse me."
She stood for a moment motionless and silent. Then her nerves;
generally so strong, so completely under control, gave way. The
violence of the struggle, the intensity of the pain she was suffering,
that overwhelming remembrance of the past, the agonising sense of what
might have been, but was now quite impossible, the feebleness of the
only weapon which she could venture to use in this battle in which her
own heart was her adversary,--all these overcame her, and she sunk
upon the bench in a helpless agony of tears.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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