garden, and how he had said, as he closed her eyes, "It is the Will of
God." He was a missionary.
But of what use is it telling a woman with a garden that she ought
really to be ashamed of herself for being happy? The fresh air is so
buoyant that it lifts all remarks of that sort away off you and leaves
you laughing. They get wafted away on the scent of the stocks, and you
stand in the sun looking round at your cheerful flowers, and more than
ever persuaded that it is a good and blessed thing to be thankful. Oh a
garden is a sweet, sane refuge to have! Whether I am tired because I
have enjoyed myself too much, or tired because I have lectured the
servants too much, or tired because I have talked to missionaries too
much, I have only to come down the verandah steps into the garden to be
at once restored to quiet, and serenity, and my real and natural self. I
could almost fancy sometimes that as I come down the steps, gentle hands
of blessing have been laid on my head. I suppose I feel so because of
the hush that descends on my soul when I get out of the close, restless
house into that silent purity. Sometimes I sit for hours in the south
walk by the verandah just listening and watching. It is so private
there, though directly beneath the windows, that it is one of my
favourite places. There are no bedrooms on that side of the house, only
the Man of Wrath's and my day-rooms, so that servants cannot see me as I
stand there enjoying myself. If they did or could, I should simply never
go there, for nothing is so utterly destructive to meditation as to know
that probably somebody inquisitive is eyeing you from behind a curtain.
The loveliest garden I know is spoilt to my thinking by the
impossibility of getting out of sight of the house, which stares down at
you, Argus-eyed and unblinking, into whatever corner you may shuffle.
Perfect house and perfect garden, lying in that land of lovely gardens,
England, the garden just the right size for perfection, not a weed ever
admitted, every dandelion and daisy--those friends of the unaspiring--
routed out years ago, the borders exquisite examples of taste, the turf
so faultless that you hardly like to walk on it for fear of making it
dusty, and the whole quite uninhabitable for people of my solitary
tendencies because, go where you will, you are overlooked. Since I have
lived in this big straggling place, full of paths and copses where I am
sure of being left alone, with wide fields and heath and forests beyond,
and so much room to move and breathe in, I feel choked, oppressed,
suffocated, in anything small and perfect. I spent a very happy
afternoon in that little English paradise, but I came away quite
joyfully, and with many a loving thought of my own dear ragged garden,
and all the corners in it where the anemones twinkle in the spring like
stars, and where there is so much nature and so little art. It will grow
I know sweeter every year, but it is too big ever to be perfect and to
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