I'll hie me straight to Richmond town, And call my liege men there; And they shall write these libels down, Or fill me with despair. I have a friend, who'll make some stir, And take my work in hand; I'll send him forth my "MESSENGER"-- To "_spy out all the land_."[4] That Messenger went gaily forth Throughout her old domain, And there found many men of worth Would snatch their pens again; And since their mothers' blood was up-- To cast her odium by, Would shed--of ink--their latest drop T' inscribe her name on high. The land which he went out to sift, _No milk and honey floods_-- _It takes not two her grapes to lift_--[5] But grapes festoon her woods. No want of food, for beast or man, There met his eager gaze; Find better bacon!--greens!--who can? Or finer fields of maize![6] Her Tuckahoes 'tis true, are slim, And of a bilious hue; But then he found the Anakim Beyond the mountains blue: Some men he found in safety chains-- All crossed upon the breast-- _They_ seem'd indeed to have no brains: But these all lands infest. The women look'd so passing fair, How shall their charms be told? By their Iachimo's[7] they were Like brilliants set in gold. Of such _pure water_ was each maid; So sparkling unto view-- No wonder that it should be said They never could turn _blue_. No foxes here, peep'd windows through; But oft at early morn They're seen to brush the glittering dew, Pursued by hounds and horn: Her "_hounds are of the Spartan breed_"-- "_So sanded and so flew'd_,"-- All "_dewlap'd_" _they, and all_ "_crook-kneed_"-- As Cadmus e'er halloo'd. In short, all zealots are run mad T' abuse this pleasing sod; Where people sleep as sound, egad, As in the land of Nod: What! colonize old coachman Dick! My foster brother Nat! My more than mother, when I'm sick! "_Come, Hal, no more of that._" NUGATOR. [Footnote 1: See Col. Benton's description of Virginia, done into verse, beginning thus: "As Benton jogg'd along the road, 'Twas in the Old Dominion, His thoughts were _bent-on_ finding food, For preconceiv'd opinion," &c.] [Footnote 2: "The fox peeped out of the window, and the rank grass waved around his head. Desolate is the dwelling of Moina--Silence is in the house of her fathers."--_Ossian_.] [Footnote 3: Man's strength is gone, his courage--zooks! And liberty's fine motions, &c.--_Benton_.] [Footnote 4: And Moses sent them to spy out the land of Canaan.] [Footnote 5: And they came unto the brook of Eshcol and cut down from thence a branch with one cluster of grapes, and they bare it between two upon a staff, ... and they told him, and said we came unto the land whither thou sentest us and surely it floweth with milk and honey, and this is the fruit of it.] [Footnote 6: In old Virginia stint of food Diseases have engender'd-- The mind is gone--to want of blood Good morals have surrender'd.