The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His WifeFirebaugh, Ellen M.
General
The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His Wife
Firebaugh, Ellen M.
Physicians -- Anecdotes; Wit and humor
After awhile the colt stopped suddenly. He urged it on. Snap! A big
something was hurled through the bushes and landed at the doctor's feet
with a heavy thud. The pommel of the saddle had caught on a grape vine
and the girths had snapped with the strain. John made a few remarks
while he was picking it up and a few more while he was getting it on the
back of the shying colt. But he finally landed it and managed to get it
half-fastened. He stood still, not knowing which way to turn. A dog was
barking somewhere--he would go in that direction. Still keeping the
bridle over his arm he spread his hands before him and slowly moved on.
At last he stopped. He seemed to be getting no nearer to the dog. All at
once, and not a great way off, he saw a fine sight. It was a lighted
doorway with the figure of a man in it. He shouted lustily,
"Bring a lantern out here, my friend, if you please. I guess I'm lost."
"All right," the man shouted back and in a few minutes the lantern was
bobbing along among the trees. "Why, Doctor!" exclaimed James Curtis,
"have you been floundering around all this time in these woods so close
to the house? Why didn't you holler before?"
"There didn't seem to be anything to 'holler' at. Until that door opened
I thought I was in the middle of these woods."
"Your wife just telephoned to know if you were at our house and I told
her you started home an hour ago."
"She'll be uneasy. Put me into the main road, will you, and we'll make
tracks for home."
When he got there and had told Mary about it, she vowed she would not
let him go to the country again when the night was so pitch dark,
realizing as she made it, the futility of her vow. Then she told him of
the message that had come in his absence and straightway sent him out
again into the darkness.
* * * * *
It was midnight. The doctor was snoring so loudly that he had awakened
Mary. Just in time. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling-ling. By hard work she got him
awake. He floundered out and along toward the little tyrant. He reached
it.
"Hello. What is it?"
"O! I got the wrong number."
"Damnation!"
Slumber again. After some time Mary was awakened by her husband's voice
asking, "What is it?"
"It's time for George to take his medicine. We've been having a dispute
about it. I said it was the powder he was to take at two o'clock and he
said it was the medicine in the bottle. Now he's mad and won't take
either."
"It was the powder. Tell him I say for him to take it now."
The answering voice sank to a whisper, but the words came very
distinctly, "I'm afraid he won't do it--he's so stubborn. I wish it was
the bottle medicine because I believe he would take that."
The doctor chuckled. "Give him that," he said. "It won't make a great
deal of difference in this case, and thinking he was in the right will
do him more good than the powder. Good night and report in the morning."
The report in the morning was that George was better!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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