We had to return to Lisieux without a favourable answer. It seemed to me as though my future were shattered for ever; the nearer I drew to the goal, the greater my difficulties became. But all the time I felt deep down in my heart a wondrous peace, because I knew that I was only seeking the Will of my Lord. ______________________________ [1] Cf. Psalm 18[19]:5. [2] Luke 5:5. [3] John 4:7. [4] Eccl. 1:14. [5] Ezechiel 16:8, 9, 13. [6] Cf. _Imit.,_ III, ch. xliii. 4. [7] Cf. Cant. 8:1. [8] Luke 19:26. [9] Cf. Luke 10:21. [10] Cant. 2:3. [11] Sister Agnes of Jesus. [12] Cf. Matt. 18:6. ______________________________ CHAPTER VI A PILGRIMAGE TO ROME Three days after the journey to Bayeux, I started on a much longer one--to the Eternal City. This journey taught me the vanity of all that passes away. Nevertheless I saw splendid monuments; I studied the countless wonders of art and religion; and better than all, I trod the very ground the Holy Apostles had trodden--the ground watered by the blood of martyrs--and my soul grew by contact with these holy things. I was delighted to go to Rome; but I could quite understand people crediting Papa with the hope that in this way I should be brought to change my mind about the religious life. It might certainly have upset a vocation that was not very strong. To begin with, Celine and I found ourselves in the company of many distinguished people. In fact, there were scarcely any others in the pilgrimage; but, far from being dazzled thereby, titles seemed to us but a "vapour of smoke,"[1] and I understood the words of the _Imitation:_ "Be not solicitous for the shadow of a great name."[2] I understood that true greatness is not found in a name but in the soul. The Prophet Isaias tells us: "The Lord shall call His servants by another name,"[3] and we read in St. John: "To him that overcometh I will give a white counter, and on the counter a new name written which no man knoweth but he that receiveth it."[4] In Heaven, therefore, we shall know our titles of nobility, and "then shall every man have praise from God,"[5] and he who on earth chose to be poorest and least known for love of his Saviour, he will be the first, the noblest, and the richest.