English fiction -- 19th century; Short stories, English
Ella was in the morning-room alone--she had taken to sitting alone
lately, brooding over her trials. She was no heroine, after all; her
mind, it is to be feared, was far from superior. She was finding out
that she had undertaken too heavy a task; she could not console herself
for her lost dream of a charmingly appointed house. She might endure to
live in such a home as George had made for her; but to be expected to
admire it, to let it be understood that it was her handiwork, that she
had chosen or approved of it--this was the burden that was crushing her.
Suddenly the door opened and George stood before her. His expression was
so altered that she scarcely recognised him; all the cheery buoyancy had
vanished, and his stern, set face had a dignity and character in it now
that were wanting before.
'I have just had a talk with Flossie,' he began; 'she has shown me what
a--what a mistake I've been making.'
Ella could not help feeling a certain relief, though she said, 'It was
very wrong of Flossie--she had no right to speak.'
'She had every right,' he said. 'She might have done it more kindly,
perhaps, but that's nothing. Why didn't you tell me yourself, Ella? You
might have trusted me!'
'I couldn't--it seemed so cruel, so ungrateful, after all you had done.
I hoped you would never know.'
'It's well for you, and for me too, that I know this while there's still
time. Ella, I've been a blind, blundering fool. I never had a suspicion
of this till--till just now, or you don't think I should have gone on
with it a single minute. I came to tell you that you need not make
yourself miserable any longer. I will put an end to this--whatever it
costs me.'
'Oh, George, I am so ashamed. I know it is weak and cowardly of me, but
I can't help it. And--and will it cost you so very much?'
'Quite as much as I can bear.'
'No; but tell me--about _how_ much? More than a hundred pounds?'
'I haven't worked it out in pounds, shillings, and pence,' he said
grimly; 'but I should put it higher myself.'
'Won't they take back some of the things? They ought to,' she suggested
timidly.
'The things? Oh, the furniture! Good Heavens, Ella! do you suppose I
care a straw about that? All I can think of is how I could have gone on
deceiving myself like this, believing I knew your every thought; and all
the time--pah, what a fool I've been!'
'I thought I should get used to it,' she pleaded. 'And oh, you don't
know how hard I have tried to bear it, not to let anyone see what I
felt--you don't know!'
'And I would rather not know,' he replied, 'for it's not exactly
flattering, you see, Ella. And at all events, it's over now. This is the
last time I shall trouble you; you will see no more of me after to-day.'
Ella could only stare at him incredulously. Had he really taken the
matter so seriously to heart as this? Could he not forgive the wound to
his vanity? How hard, how utterly unworthy of him!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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