_Enter_ SOSIA, _peeping about him; and, seeing_ MERCURY, _is starting back_. _Sos._ Here he is again; and there's no passing by him into the house, unless I were a sprite, to glide in through the key-hole. I am to be a vagabond, I find. _Merc._ Sosia, come back. _Sos._ No, I thank you; you may whistle me long enough; a beaten dog has always the wit to avoid his master. _Merc._ I permit thee to be Sosia again. _Sos._ 'Tis an unfortunate name, and I abandon it: he that has an itch to be beaten, let him take it up for Sosia;--What have I said now! I mean for me; for I neither am nor will be Sosia. _Merc._ But thou may'st be so in safety; for I have acknowledged myself to be god Mercury. _Sos._ You may be a god, for aught I know; but the devil take me if ever I worship you, for an unmerciful deity as you are. _Merc._ You ought to take it for an honour to be drubbed by the hand of a divinity. _Sos._ I am your most humble servant, good Mr God; but, by the faith of a mortal, I could well have spared the honour that you did me. But how shall I be sure that you will never assume my shape again? _Merc._ Because I am weary of wearing so villainous an outside. _Sos._ Well, well; as villainous as it is, here's old Bromia will be contented with it. _Brom._ Yes, now I am sure that I may chastise you safely, and that there's no god lurking under your appearance. _Sos._ Ay; but you had best take heed how you attempt it; for, as Mercury has turned himself into me, so I may take the toy into my head, and turn myself into Mercury, that I may swinge you off condignly. _Merc._ In the mean time, be all my witnesses, that I take Phædra for my wife of the left hand; that is, in the nature of a lawful concubine. _Phæd._ You shall pardon me for believing you, for all you are a god; for you have a terrible ill name below; and I am afraid you'll get a footman, instead of a priest, to marry us. _Merc._ But here's Gripus shall draw up articles betwixt us. _Phæd._ But he's damnably used to false conveyancing. Well, be it so; for my counsel shall over-look them before I sign--Come on, Gripus, that I may have him under black and white. [_Here_ GRIPUS _gets ready pen, ink, and paper_. _Merc._ With all my heart, that I may have thee under black and white hereafter. _Phæd._ [_To_ GRIPUS.] Begin, begin--Heads of articles to be made, &c. betwixt Mercury, god of thieves---- _Merc._ And Phædra, queen of gypsies.----_Imprimis_, I promise to buy and settle upon her an estate, containing nine thousand acres of land, in any part of Boeotia, to her own liking. _Phæd._ Provided always, that no part of the said nine thousand acres shall be upon, or adjoining to, Mount Parnassus; for I will not be fobbed off with a poetical estate. Merc. _Memorandum_, that she be always constant to me, and admit of no other lover. Phæd. _Memorandum_, unless it be a lover that offers more; and that the constancy shall not exceed the settlement.