Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancerIsaacson, Lauren Ann
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Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancer
Isaacson, Lauren Ann
Cancer -- Patients -- Biography; Isaacson, Lauren Ann, 1961-1986
Aside from mealtimes and occasional strolls to exercise their legs, my
parents remained near my bed until the ripe hours of the evening. Near
8 p.m. Mom was paged on the hospital intercom. Receiving the phone at
the Nurses Station, she found herself conversing with Dr. T., the
surgeon who would lead a team scheduled for my case the following day.
The operation would be of great consequence, and he wished Mom to fully
acknowledge that fact before it commenced; to all operations, a risk
was involved, and regarding the seriousness of the situation was of
utmost importance. Since the mass had so thoroughly encroached upon
the stomach, they would have to remove most of the stomach itself,
thereby reducing its overall size considerably; though the stomach
would stretch with time, it would never return to its original size.
The conversation came to a close. It seemed awful that a young girl,
Mom's little girl, should have to endure so much, so massive an
operation. She returned to the hospital room where I still breathed
steadily in a tranquil repose; while Dad received the portents of the
previous conversation, I was adrift on a sea bereft of anxiety or pain,
and ignorant of their anticipation, I did not stir when they stood to
return to their hotel.
The day of the operation had dawned amid countless hours of waiting,
yet the waiting for my parents had not ended; the minutes would drag
while I laid beyond their sight, and a doctor kindly advised that they
leave the building, for the operation would most surely prove quite
lengthy, and the hospital atmosphere had less to offer than did the
beauty of the nearby sanctuary on the hospital grounds. They
nodded, numbly deciding to try his remedy for over-wrought parents.
Mom and Dad found their way to the garden, their legs propelling leaden
bodies through some distant, unknown source of power. Ambling through
the sunlit passages like automatons, their eyes would focus, yet they
did not see. Finally disposing of the useless suggestion, they checked
their course and wheeled around to return to the hospital once more.
They felt compelled to be nearby, even though there was nothing with
which to occupy their senses; the operation so filled the capacity of
their thoughts that no other form of diversion was required.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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