"I intended something of the sort," returned the spirit, extricating
himself from the head of Aunt Sallie, and ensconcing himself on the
paper-weight on Hopkins' desk. "But I didn't have time. You see,
immediately after the trial a perfect avalanche of litigants from other
offices slid into mine, and within a week I was so overwhelmed with
business that I had to hire the rest of this floor here to find room for
my papers. It was painful to me, too, to observe that those who had
heard of my fame, but who had never seen me, were manifestly
disappointed, when taking their departure at the close of a first
interview, at having found me so much less great than they had been led
to believe by the public estimate of my abilities. Nevertheless, cases
of the most intricate sort were fairly dumped into my hands by the
cart-load, and, worst of all, I found that eminence brought with it
other responsibilities which I was ill-prepared to meet. I was
constantly in receipt of requests to lecture on subjects of a variety
that would have appalled the fiend himself, and worse than all I was
called into consultation by the Crown in certain litigation of
international importance. For a time I tried to go it alone, and by
assiduous devotion to study to fit myself for the responsibilities which
my fame had brought me, but it was impossible. I broke down in less than
a month; but having tasted the joys of prominence I was not strong
enough to resist the temptation to prolong it indefinitely, and, without
thinking of the means, I committed myself to certain undertakings which
were utterly beyond my intellectual strength to accomplish, and then,
when brought face to face with failure and disgrace, there was but one
thing left for me to do, and that I did.
"I summoned the fiend. The mere expression of a desire to see him was
sufficient to bring him into my presence, and time and time again did I
subject my poor body for ambition's sake to the dreadful interchange of
spirits.
"From without I watched my development from mediocrity to fame with a
joyous interest, not unmixed, however, with regret, for, at such moments
as were permitted me to enjoy the undivided possession of myself, I
could not but feel conscious of a diminution of physical strength which
detracted materially from my happiness; and yet when day after day I saw
my name in print, and noted that I was regarded as one of the most
marvellous intellectual products of the day, I could not bring myself to
the point where I could renounce everything I had gained, and withdraw
to the contented life of the recluse. Let a man once taste a living
immortality, Hopkins, and I care not how strong his character may be, he
would part with all that he holds most dear sooner than he would
renounce that.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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