Humorous stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Private secretaries -- Fiction
From that on all she spouts is baby talk, while she mauls and paws him
around like he was a sack of meal. I couldn't help glancin' at Auntie,
for that's one thing she and Vee have agreed on, that strangers wasn't
to be allowed to take any such liberties with baby. Besides, Auntie
never did have any use for this Mrs. Butt anyway and hardly speaks to
her civil when she meets her. Now Auntie is squirmin' in her chair and I
can guess how her fingers are itchin' to rescue the youngster.
"Um precious 'ittle sweetums, ain't oo?" gurgles Mrs. Butt, rootin' him
in the stomach with her nose. "Won't um let me tiss um's tweet 'ittle
pinky winky toes?"
She's just tryin' to haul off one of his shoes when 'Ikky-boy cuts loose
with the rough motions, fists and feet both in action, until she has to
straighten up to save her hat and her hair.
"Dess one 'ittle toe-tiss?" she begs.
"Say," demands 'Ikky-boy, pushin' her face away fretful, "where oo get
'at stuff?"
"Wha-a-at?" gasps Mrs. Butt.
"Lay off 'at, tant you?" says he "Oo--oo give 'Ikky-boy a big pain, Oo
does. G'way!"
"Why, how rude!" says Mrs. Butt, gazin' around bewildered; and then, as
she spots that approvin' smile on Auntie's face, she turns red in the
ears.
Say, I don't know when I've seen the old girl look so tickled over
anything. What she's worked up is almost a grin. And there's no doubt
that Mrs. Butt knows why it's there.
"Of course," says she, "if you approve of such language----" and handin'
the youngster over to Vee she straightens her lid and makes a quick
exit.
"Bing!" says I. "I guess we got a slap on the wrist that time."
"I don't care a bit," says Vee, holdin' her chin well up. "She had no
business mauling baby in that fashion."
"I ain't worryin' if she never comes back," says I, "only I'd just
promised Auntie to train 'Ikky-boy to talk different and----"
"Under similar provocation," says Auntie, "I might use the same
expressions--if I knew how."
"Hip, hip, for Auntie!" I sings out. "And as for your not knowin' how,
that's easy fixed. 'Ikky-boy and I will give you lessons."
And say, after he'd finished his play and was about ready to be tucked
into his crib, what does the young jollier do but climb up in Auntie's
lap and cuddle down folksy, all on his own motion.
"Do you like your old Auntie, Richard?" she asks, smoothin' his red
curls gentle.
"Uh-huh," says 'Ikky-boy, blinkin' up at her mushy. "Oo's a swell
Auntie."
Are we back in the will again? I'll guess we are.
CHAPTER XI
LOUISE REVERSES THE CLOCK
It was one of Mr. Robert's cute little ideas, you might know. He's an
easy boss in a good many ways and I have still to run across a job that
I'd swap mine for, the pay envelopes being fifty-fifty. But say, when it
comes to usin' a private sec. free and careless he sure is an ace of
aces.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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