This individual had a very intellectual forehead, measuring about an
inch and a quarter in height, and punched in at the sides to match. His
eyes were set deep in their sockets, and something like a pig’s, only
the colour was not as good. His nose pushed boldly out, as it started
from the lower part of his forehead, as though it meant to be something,
but when it had reached half its destination, it bent suddenly in like a
parrot’s beak. His upper lip was long and thin, and was stretched on a
sort of rack, which was made by a couple of supernumerary teeth, which
stuck out very prominently. His chin, too modest to attempt a rivalry
with his projecting lip, receded backwards towards the throat, so that,
to look at him in front, you did not perceive that he had any chin at
all. His hair was very light and bristly. A snuff-coloured coat of
domestic manufacture adorned the upper part of his person. It was an
ancient affair. The velvet was worn from the collar in several places,
but which was carefully patched with red flannel, being the nearest
approach to the original colour of the collar that could be found in his
domestic menagerie of reserved rags. The buttons, which one would
naturally look for at the bottom of the waist, had wandered up between
his shoulders. The coat was remarkably long, extending from high up on
the shoulders to the lower part of the calves of his legs. He was
slightly round-shouldered, so that when he stood right up, a small lady
might have found shelter in a rain storm in the vacancy left beween the
coat and the back. His pants, to common observers, would have been
called too short, but he denied this, averring that his legs were too
long for his trowsers. On his arm hung an old-fashioned camblet cloak,
with the lining of green baize hanging about a quarter of a yard below
the edge of the camblet. He said this was no fault of the lining,
anyhow; “it got wet, and t’other shrunk a leetle, but the lining stuck
to it like blazes.” The Yankee was exceedingly anxious to secure his
passage by the first boat, and he sang out to some person:
“Say, yeou, where is the Captain of this consarn. Say, yeou, (to some
one else,) I want the Captain. Look here, Nigger, show a feller the
Captain. Look here, you black sarpint, don’t stick out your lips at me.
Wal, I swow, I’ll give anybody three cents that will show me the
Captain.”
The Captain, hearing the noise, stepped forward, and told the Yankee if
he wished to see the Captain, he was commander of the boat.
“Dew tell? Wal, I swan, you have got a kind of commanding way about you,
that’s a fact.”
“What do you wish?” said the Captain.
“Wal, I want a bathe.”
“Very well, jump into the river, there is plenty of water.”
“I tell you, I want a bathe.”
“Well, don’t I tell you to jump in, you can swim across if you like; we
shall not start just yet.”
“I want a bathe to lie down in. Now do you know what I mean, darn you?”
“Oh, you want a berth?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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