"I protest I have the greatest--ahem!--admiration for the ladies of our acquaintance. We have an excellent assortment,--we have witty women; brilliant women; women of taste and genius; exact and fastidious women,--a full supply,--accomplished women; finished and elegant women,--not too many, but still we have them; learned women; gentle, amiable, tender women; sharp and caustic women; sensible and practical women; domestic women,--all unimpeachable,--all good in their kind." "Then why is matrimony so dangerous?" "No, no, not dangerous, exactly,--thanks to discreet nurture and northern winters; not dangerous hereabouts as it was in the days of the old satirists. A wise man may be safe enough here from any climax of matrimonial evil; but there are minor mischiefs, daily _desagremens_." "What, in spite of that catalogue of feminine virtues which you delivered just now?" "Vanity of vanities! Admirable in the abstract; excellent at a safe distance; but to be tied to for life, bed and board, day light and candle light,--that's another thing." "Even the tender and amiable,--is there risk even there?" "One cloys on perpetual sweetmeats." "And the domestic women?" "Who incarcerate themselves in their nurseries, and have no brains but for their babies; who are frantic if the infant coughs, and are buried and lost among cradles, porringers, go-carts, pills, and prescriptions." "The brilliant woman, then?" "Brilliant at dinner tables and _soirees_; but, on the next day, your Corinne is disconsolate with a headache. Her wit is for the world,--her moods and mopings, caprices and lamentations,--those she keeps for her husband." "You are a cynic. The woman of taste and genius; where do you place her?" "What are the rude heart and brain of a man to such exalted susceptibilities? What homage is too much for him to render? Be a bond slave to the sweet enthusiast. Bow yourself before the delicate shrine. Do your devoirs; she will not bate you a jot." "But there are in the world women governed by reason." "My dear Morton, are you demented? A woman always rational, always sensible, always consistent; a logical woman; one who can distinguish the relations of cause and effect, one who marches straight to her purpose like a man,--who ever found such a woman; or, finding her, who could endure such a one?" "You fly into extremes; but women may be rational, as well as men." "I like to see the organ of faith well developed,--yours is a miracle. Granted, a rational woman; and with a liberal rendering of the word, such, I admit, are now and then seen,--women always even, always cheerful, never morbid, always industrious, always practical; busy with good works,--charity, for example, or making puddings,--pious daughters, model wives, pattern mothers----" "At last you have found a creditable character."