Hermine was possessed by vague, youthful expectations of what life
could so easily bring her, out of its whole long length, a life wherein
someone would surely love her,--for want of another the thin young
man she sometimes met on the stairs, who gave violin lessons to keep
a passionate soul in a delicate body. Perhaps, sensitive, artistic,
he would indeed be goaded on by that lurking, tricking spirit of the
will-to-live to take Hermine, dull Hermine for wife, wrapping her for
the brief moment necessary for the act in his own passion which would
so perfectly conceal her essential poverty....
Suddenly Pauli stopped, the blood had gone from his face, leaving him
very pale, but his eyes were full of a dark fire and in his bones was
a grinding pain. He was in a mad hurry to be gone from that house of
ghosts where he couldn't hold his being together.
"I'm rushed this afternoon, heaps of things to attend to," he cried as
he lay down his batons and threw the scarlet cloth over the zimbalon.
To his goodbye to Tante Ilde he added the reminder loudly, distinctly:
"It's understood, Tante Ilde, you're coming every Tuesday?" Then
suddenly he was gone leaving the room dim and chill.
Anna went over to the window and stood by it, though she couldn't see
into the street. Hermine almost immediately began to clear off the
table.
But Tante Ilde sat quite still. She was thinking, "poor Anna, poor
Anna." There was something very tender in her leave-taking, something
that Anna gratefully, dumbly accepted without knowing what it was that
was offered her, and then Tante Ilde slipped away to walk those several
miles back to the Hoher Markt.
She had vaguely, diffidently hoped that she might go away when Pauli
did, be carried along on his momentum. But he had gone so suddenly,
there hadn't been time for any little arrangement or suggestion.
It was beginning to rain. The wind blew flat, cold drops against her
face. She stood a moment looking at the trolleys clanging up and down
the Mariahilfer Street. Why hadn't she walked in the morning?
IV
HERMANN AND MIZZI
_Staccato_
Hin ist hin! Verloren ist verloren.
When Doctor Hermann Bruckner was suddenly called from the security of
his civil practice to take charge of a field-hospital, so great was the
joy of his secret heart that even his wife became aware of it, and in
her rustiest and most contentious tone asked him what on earth he was
so pleased about, he was going out to the "olly" front where he was
certain to be either killed or mutilated, and walking as if on air at
the idea of getting there!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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