Cowan o' Beeslack; an' thays he--a thpeakin' frae his thrapple; jist what the Italian chap was sayin'--'Gentlemen, electurth of Midlothian,' compressin' his thrapple. Dash't, ye couldna' hear him back three sates; but when Wully Gladstone cam' to the front o' the pletform, what a difference--a' wind"; and as an example he repeated "Gentlemen electors" in a deep stentorian voice, contrasting with his high-pitched imitation of the chairman, as he remarked about Gladstone: "That's the very way he spoke. I didna ken till I gaed up to this Italian that a' they thingers an' elocutionists an' ministers, an' a' they devils, they a' go in for this new-fashioned v'ice production." DAVID AND GOLIATH The moral of this story is, "Ne sutor ultra crepidam," or "The shoemaker should stick to his stool," or creepie, as it is in the Latin, and in this case it is illustrated by the result of a butcher trying to preach. Before the Forth Bridge was built--of course the incident happened a considerable time before the famous structure was erected; but previous to its means of transit, a steamer used to cross daily to the Fife shore, and on Thursday nights among the passengers there was a revival preacher; but one night, on account of a storm, the boat did not venture to cross, and the people of a Fife village were left without one to conduct the service. After waiting some time, Tom Carmichael, the village butcher, was pressed to take the position of pastor. Unfortunately, Tom had never previously spoken in public, and he had the further drawback of having an impediment in his speech, which was accentuated when, as in his present position, he was nervous through excitement.