Women of Modern France (Illustrated): Woman: In all ages and in all countries Vol. 7 (of 10)Thieme, Hugo P. (Hugo Paul)
History
Women of Modern France (Illustrated): Woman: In all ages and in all countries Vol. 7 (of 10)
Thieme, Hugo P. (Hugo Paul)
France -- Social life and customs; Women -- France
Mme. de Lambert taught her children to be satisfied with nothing
but the highest attainable object. She advised her son to choose his
friends from among men above him, in order to accustom himself to
respectful and polite demeanor; "with his equals he might cultivate
negligence and his mind might become dull." She desired her children
to think differently from the people--"Those who think lowly and
commonly, and the court is filled with such." To their servants they
were to be good and kind, for humanity and Christianity make
all equal. She was the first to use those words, "humanity" and
"equality," which later became the bywords of everyone, and the first
to teach that conscience is the best guide. "Conscience is defined as
that interior sentiment of a delicate honor which assures you that you
have nothing with which to reproach yourself."
Possibly the most important and lasting effect of Mme. de Lambert's
influence resulted from the expression of her ideas on the education
of young women who "are destined to please, and are given lessons
only in methods of delighting and pleasing." She was convinced that in
order to resist temptation and be normal, women must be educated, must
learn to think. Her counsels to her daughter are remarkable for an
unusual insight into the temperament of her sex and for an extreme
fear that makes her call to her aid all precautions and resources. She
thus advises her daughter:
"Try to find resources within yourself--this is a revenue of certain
pleasures. Do not believe that your only virtue is modesty; there are
many women who know no other virtue, and who imagine that it relieves
them of all duties toward society; they believe they are right in
lacking all others and think themselves privileged to be proud and
slanderous with impunity. You must have a gentle modesty; a good
woman may have the advantages of a man's friendship without abandoning
honesty and faithfulness to her duties. Nothing is so difficult as to
please without the use of what seems like coquettishness. It is more
often by their defects than by their good qualities that women please
men; men seek to profit by the weaknesses of good and kind women,
for whose virtues they care nothing, and they prefer to be amused by
persons not very estimable than to be forced merely to admire virtuous
persons."
This is a most faithful description of the society of her time, and
it was because her treatises struck home that they were severely
criticised; but, nothing daunted, she carried out her plans in her own
way, resorting neither to intrigue nor artifice. Many of her sayings
became household maxims, such as--"It is not always faults that undo
us; it is the manner of conducting ourselves after having committed
them."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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