“The big German lad (Hagner) leaned gently against the leather apple
(leaned against the ball. Do you call Hagner’s style of hitting,
leaning?) and knocked it out of the orchard (over the fence) shaking
the tree for four more juicy ones (you mean four more runs) for Lowell.
Ty fouled to Bowman. Three out (why, such ordinary English?).
“After that for the third, fourth, fifth and sixth spasms (innings)
neither side got a look in (very ordinary, Tim), although three
hopefuls from each college went boldly to the front, only to be cut
down in their youth before crossing the Rubicon (you are giving out,
Tim, this isn’t nearly so good).”
“Wait until you strike the music in the seventh inning,” answered Tim.
The Professor went on reading, “In the stand-up session (oh, yes!
seventh inning), however, the tonsorial artists (good! the Barbers)
made the Lowell hair stand up (I don’t get that one).”
“Gave us a scare,” explained Tim.
“Hughie sent the Infant in (Infant?)”
“Radams,” said Tim, “his nickname is Babe.”
“Oh, of course, the Infant,” went on the Professor. “Hughie sent the
Infant in for a piece of pie (piece of pie, why pie?).”
“Well, the game was easy and Hughie wanted to give Babe a little
practical experience.”
“I see,” said the Professor, “very good, indeed, we will continue.
Jones the first shaver (he must have been a Barber man) swung the sign
(the sign?).”
“Yes, the sign--the barber pole--the stick--the bat.”
“Ah, yes, very good; swung the sign on a drop (drop ball) and raised it
over Arthur’s study box (study box--do you mean--of course, you mean,
he raised it over Delvin’s head) for a single. The fellow with the
after 6 P. M. name (let me think. Guess you’ll have to help me again,
Tim).”
“Read a little farther,” said Tim.
“The fellow with the after 6 P. M. name waited patiently, and as the
Babe couldn’t see the plate because Knight was near (oh, yes! I see his
name was Knight, very good, indeed, Babe couldn’t see the plate, ha!
ha!) he walked. Wilson hit a slow one to Johnny which he came in on and
rolled around the sod (Everson must have fumbled), while Jones, Knight
and Wilson perched on the salt bags (very ordinary that last), Hughie
wigwagged (signaled) the infield to come close so they could hear the
song of the Whirling Sphere and join in the chorus.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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