“Well, I only hope you’ll keep the foreign puppy tied up safe, until I can give him in charge to those who will take good care of him, I warrant,” remarked the Major, still referring to the mustachioed Count. The clerk, however, took the word puppy in its literal sense, and alluding to the greyhound, said— “Don’t make yourself uneasy on that score, sir; we’ve got a cord wound the animal’s neck, and it’s quite impossible for the cweature to get away. We’ve given him some bwead and water, sir, so that he wont hurt for a little while.” “That’s all right, then,” responded Major Oldschool; “bread and water’s quite good enough for him.” “I can assure you, sir, he’s considered such a handsome dog by all the ladies as has seen him since his awival, that it’s been as much as we could do to get some of them away fwom him, for they, one and all, declare that he’s the most beautiful Italian they’ve ever beheld, and that they’ve half a mind to wun away with the pet.” “Well,” exclaimed the Major, “hang me if I can see what the women can find to admire in the filthy hairy brutes.” “They say, sir,” replied the official, “he’s so wemarkably elegant, and such a beautiful foxy colour. A lady of title, I can assure you, sir, told me this vewy morning, that if the beautiful dog was hers, the pet should have nothing but chickens to eat, because meat, she said, always made their bweath foul.” Here the Major raved and stormed against the fair sex in general, and his niece in particular, in such a manner as made the youthful Official stare again in wonder, at the apparent unmeaningness of his conduct. When the gentleman had grown a little calm, the clerk ventured, before taking his leave, to say he was instructed to wequest him to send for that baggage of his as soon as possible. Now, the Major, however irate he might have felt against his runaway niece, was in no way inclined to permit a stranger to apply such a term to a female member of his family. The consequence was, that the words were no sooner uttered, than the exasperated soldier rushed at the terrified young clerk, and shaking him violently by the collar, demanded to know what he meant by “baggage.” The youth was only able to stammer out that he alluded to his “heap,” up at their place. The term “heap,” applied to a lady, only served to increase the fury of the Major; so releasing his hold of the young gentleman’s collar, he proceeded to kick him round and round the room with his wooden leg.