'You've sold yourself,' he said quickly, 'gone down into the gutter
. . . . Oh!'
'The gutter.' Victoria was so full of contempt that it almost hurt her.
'Of course I'm in the gutter. I always was in the gutter. I was in the
gutter when I married and my husband boarded and lodged me to be his
favourite. I was in the gutter when I had to kow-tow to underbred
people; to be a companion is to prostitute friendship. You don't mind
that, do you? I was in the gutter in the tea shops, when I decoyed men
into coming to the place because they could touch me, breathe me. I'm in
the gutter now, but I'm in the right one. I've found the one that's
going to make me free.'
Edward was shaken by her passion.
'You'll never be free,' he faltered, 'you're an outcast.'
'An outcast from what?' sneered Victoria. 'From society? What has
society done for me? It's kicked me, it's bled me. It's made me work ten
hours a day for eight bob a week. It'd have sucked me dry and offered me
the workhouse, or the Thames at the end. It made me almost a cripple.'
Edward stared.
'Yes,' said Victoria savagely. 'That makes you squirm, sentimentalist.
Look at that!'
She put her foot on a chair, tucked up her skirt, tore down the
stocking. Purplish still, the veins stood out on the firm white flesh.
Edward clenched both his hands and looked away. A look of pain was in
his eyes.
'Yes, look at that,' raged Victoria. 'That's what your society's done
for me. It's chucked me into the water to teach me to swim, and it's
gloated over every choke. It's fine talking about chivalry, isn't it,
when you see what honest labour's done for me, isn't it? It's fine
talking about purity when you see the price your society pays me for
being what I am, isn't it? Look at me. Look at my lace, look at my
diamonds, look at my house . . . and think of the other side: eight bob
a week, ten hours work a day, a room with no fire, and a bed with no
sheets. But I know your society now, and as I can't kill it I'll cheat
it. I've served it and it's got two years of my life; but I'm going to
get enough out of it to make it crawl.'
She strode towards Edward.
'So don't you come preaching to me,' she hissed.
Edward's head bent down. Slowly he walked towards the door.
'Yes,' she said, 'go. I've no use for you. I'm out for stronger meat.'
He opened the door, then, without looking up,
'Good-bye,' he said.
The door closed behind him. Victoria looked about her for some seconds,
then sat down in the carving chair, her arms outstretched on the table.
Her teeth were clenched now, her jaw set; with indomitable purpose she
looked out into the darkening room where she saw the battle and victory
of life.
CHAPTER IV
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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