Dreiser, Theodore, 1871-1945; Journalists -- United States -- Biography; Novelists, American -- 20th century -- Biography
The office of the _Globe_ proved a sprouting-bed for incipient literary
talent. Hazard had, some fifteen or eighteen months before, in company
with another newspaper man of whom later I heard amazing things, written
a novel entitled _Theo_, which was plainly a bog-fire kindled by those
blazing French suns, Zola and Balzac. The scene was laid in Paris
(imagine two Western newspaper men who had never been out of America
writing a novel of French life and laying it in Paris!) and had much of
the atmosphere of Zola’s _Nana_, plus the delicious idealism of Balzac’s
_The Great Man from the Provinces_. Never having read either of these
authors at this time, I did not see the similarity, but later I saw it
plainly. One or both of these men had fed up on the French realists to
such an extent that they were able to create the illusion of France (for
me at least) and at the same time to fire me with a desire to create
something, perhaps a novel of this kind but preferably a play. It seemed
intensely beautiful to me at the time, this book, with its frank
pictures of raw, greedy, sensual human nature, and its open pictures of
self-indulgence and vice.
The way this came about was interesting but I would not relate it save
that it had such a marked effect on me. I was sitting in the city
reportorial room later one gloomy December afternoon, having returned
from a fruitless assignment, when a letter was handed me. It was
postmarked Chicago and addressed in the handwriting of Alice. Up to then
I had allowed matters to drift, having, as I have said, written but one
letter in which I apologized rather indifferently for having come away
without seeing her. But my conscience had been paining me so much that
when I saw her writing I started. I tore the letter open and read with a
sense of shame:
“Dear Theo:
“I got your letter the day you left, but then it was too late. I
know what you say is true, about your being called away, and I
don’t blame you. I’m only sorry our quarrel” (there had been
none save of my making) “didn’t let you come to see me before
you left. Still, that was my fault too, I guess. I can’t blame
you entirely for that.
“Anyhow, Theo, that isn’t what I’m writing you for. You know
that you haven’t been just the same to me as you once were. I
know how you feel. I have felt it too. I want to know if you
won’t send me back the letters I wrote you. You won’t want them
now. Please send them, Theo, and believe I am as ever your
friend,
“ALICE.”
There was a little blank space on the paper, and then:
“I stood by the window last night and looked out on the street.
The moon was shining and those dead trees over the way were
waving in the wind. I saw the moon on that little pool of water
over in the field. It looked like silver. Oh, Theo, I wish I
were dead.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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