I by no means guarantee that the whole song I proceed to give is what was sung at the dinner: I suspect, by the completeness of the chain, that augmentations have been made. My deceased friend was just the man to add some verses, or the addition may have been made before it came into his hands, or since his decease, for the scraps containing the verses passed through several hands before they came into mine. We may, however, be pretty sure that the original is substantially contained in what is given, and that the character is therefore preserved. I have had myself to repair damages every now and then, in the way of conjectural restoration of defects caused by ill-usage. {380} THE ASTRONOMER'S DRINKING SONG. "Whoe'er would search the starry sky, Its secrets to divine, sir, Should take his glass--I mean, should try A glass or two of wine, sir! True virtue lies in golden mean, And man must wet his clay, sir; Join these two maxims, and 'tis seen He should drink his bottle a day, sir! "Old Archimedes, reverend sage! By trump of fame renowned, sir, Deep problems solved in every page, And the sphere's curved surface found,[774] sir: Himself he would have far outshone, And borne a wider sway, sir, Had he our modern secret known, And drank a bottle a day, sir! "When Ptolemy,[775] now long ago, Believed the earth stood still, sir, He never would have blundered so, Had he but drunk his fill, sir: He'd then have felt[776] it circulate, And would have learnt to say, sir, The true way to investigate Is to drink your bottle a day, sir! "Copernicus,[777] that learned wight, The glory of his nation, With draughts of wine refreshed his sight, And saw the earth's rotation; {381} Each planet then its orb described, The moon got under way, sir; These truths from nature he imbibed For he drank his bottle a day, sir! "The noble[778] Tycho placed the stars, Each in its due location; He lost his nose[779] by spite of Mars, But that was no privation: Had he but lost his mouth, I grant He would have felt dismay, sir, Bless you! _he_ knew what he should want To drink his bottle a day, sir! "Cold water makes no lucky hits; On mysteries the head runs: Small drink let Kepler[780] time his wits On the regular polyhedrons: He took to wine, and it changed the chime, His genius swept away, sir, Through area varying[781] as the time At the rate of a bottle a day, sir! "Poor Galileo,[782] forced to rat Before the Inquisition, _E pur si muove_[783] was the pat He gave them in addition: {382} He meant, whate'er you think you prove, The earth must go its way, sirs; Spite of your teeth I'll make it move, For I'll drink my bottle a day, sirs!