A Cry in the WildernessWaller, Mary E. (Mary Ella)
General
A Cry in the Wilderness
Waller, Mary E. (Mary Ella)
New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Québec (Province) -- Fiction
"Marcia, I ain't no right to speak--to break a promise; but, by God, I
'll do it this time to save you--whatever comes! Gordon Ewart ain't no
more your father 'n I am, for he was your mother's husband."
"My mother's husband?" I echoed, but weakly. I failed for a few
seconds to comprehend.
"Yes, your mother's husband. Gordon Ewart is George Jackson--George
Gordon Ewart Jackson, thet is what he was christened, an' I 've known
it sence the furst minute I set eyes on him in full lamplight, here in
this very house on the fifteenth day of last November. Do you want any
more proof?"
There is a limit to human suffering; a time when a surcharge of misery
leaves mind and heart and soul numb. It was so with me upon hearing
Cale's statement.
"Did he know you?" I asked almost apathetically.
"Yes, but it took him twenty-four hours. I 've changed more 'n he has."
"Why did n't he use his own name?"
"It is his own. He sloughed off thet part of it thet hindered him from
cuttin' loose from all thet old life, he said, an' made the new one
legal."
"Did he know me?"
"I don't know for sure. He ain't the kind to rake over a heap of dead
ashes for the sake of findin' one little spark. But, Marcia, I believe
he knew you from the minute he first see you there in the passageway."
"What makes you think so?"
"Because you are the livin' image of your mother, as I told you once
before. But you act different. An' he loved her so, he could n't help
but seein' her in you--"
"Oh, my God!"
I think it was a groan rather than an exclamation. My head dropped on
Cale's hand, as it lay over mine. The flashlight of intuition showed
me the truth: this man, my mother's husband, the man who was dearer to
me than life itself, was again loving her, whom he had loved only to
lose, in me--her daughter! He was loving me because of her, not
because of myself.
Oh, I saw it in every detail! I saw every ugly feature in every act of
the whole tragedy; and I saw myself the dupe of that Past from which I
had tried so hard to escape.
I raised my head. My decision was made. I looked at Cale defiantly.
I think every fibre of me, moral, physical, mental, spiritual, revolted
then and there against being made longer a mere shuttlecock for the
battledores of Fate.
"Cale, when does the next afternoon train leave the junction--the one
that connects with the Southern Quebec for New England?"
"Don't, Marcia, in the name of all that's holy, don't do nothing rash.
I meant it for the best--"
"I know you did; but that won't prevent my going."
"But, hear to reason, Marcia; wait till Ewart comes---hear what he has
to say--I 'm placed where I can't speak. Wait a few days."
His hand felt clammy cold under mine. I pulled mine away. I hurt him,
but I did not care.
"There is nothing to be said. I am going. When does that train leave?"
"Seven-five. What will Ewart say? You are doing him a bitterer wrong
than your mother before you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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