Authors, American -- 19th century -- Biography; Authors, American -- 20th century -- Biography; Garland, Hamlin, 1860-1940
[Mary Isabel reads the book at intervals and places it next to _Hesper_
and _The Captain of the Gray Horse Troop_.]
Marriage, paternity, householding, during these years unquestionably put
the brakes on my work as a writer, but I had no desire to return to
bachelorhood. Undoubtedly I had lost something, but I had gained more.
As a human being I was enriched beyond my deserving by a wife and a
child.
Perhaps I would have gone farther and mounted higher as a selfish
solitary bachelor, but that did not trouble me then, and does not now.
Concerned with the problem of providing a comfortable winter home for my
family, and happy in maintaining the old house in West Salem as a
monument to the memory of my mother, I wrote, committed carpentry and
lectured.
My frequent absences from home soon made a deep impression on my
daughter's mind, and whenever she was naughty I had but to say, "If you
do that again Papa will go away to New York," and she would instantly
say, "I'm doodie now papa, I'm doodie----" and yet my mention of going
to New York could not have been altogether a punishment for I always
brought to her some toy or book. Nothing afforded me keener joy than the
moment when I showed her the presents I had brought.
The fact that she loved to have her heavy-handed old Daddy near her, was
a kind of miracle, a concession for which I could not be too grateful.
"You shall have a happy childhood," I vowed, "no matter what comes
later, you shall remember these days with unalloyed delight. They shall
be your heaven, your fairyland."
Each month I set down in my diary some new phrase, some development,
some significant event in her life, and when she found this out she
loved to have me read what she had said, "When I was a little baby." She
listened gravely, contrasting her ignorance at two with her wisdom at
five. "Was I cute, Daddy? Did you like me then?" she would ask.
She early learned the meaning of Decoration Day, which she called "Flag
Day," and took pride in the fact that her grand-sire was a soldier. Each
year she called for her flag and asked to be taken to the cemetery to
see the decorations and to hear the bugles blow above the graves, and I
always complied; although to me, each year, a more poignant pathos
quavered in the wailing cadence of "Lights out," and the passing of the
veterans, thinning so rapidly--was like the march of men toward their
open graves.
Happily my daughter did not realize any part of this tragic concept. For
her it was natural that a soldier should be old and bent. Waving her
little flag and shouting with silver-sweet voice she saluted with vague
admiration those who were about to die--an age about to die--and in her
eyes flamed the spirit of her grand-sire, the love of country which
will carry the Republic through every storm no matter from which quarter
the wind may spring.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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