Ethics -- Fiction; Religion and sociology -- Fiction; Upper class families -- Fiction
So fragmentary and confused are the events of that day that a cubist
literature were necessary to convey the impressions left upon me. I had
something of the feeling of a recruit who for the first time is taking
part in a brilliant and complicated manoeuvre. Tom and Susan Peters
flit across the view, and Gene Hollister and Perry Blackwood and the
Ewanses,--all of whom had come up in a special car; Ralph Hambleton
was “best man,” looking preternaturally tall in his frock-coat: and
his manner, throughout the whole proceeding, was one of good-natured
tolerance toward a folly none but he might escape.
“If you must do it, Hughie, I suppose you must,” he had said to me.
“I'll see you through, of course. But don't blame me afterwards.”
Maude was a little afraid of him....
I dressed at George's; then, like one of those bewildering shifts of
a cinematograph, comes the scene in church, the glimpse of my mother's
wistful face in the front pew; and I found myself in front of the
austere Mr. Doddridge standing beside Maude--or rather beside a woman
I tried hard to believe was Maude--so veiled and generally encased was
she. I was thinking of this all the time I was mechanically answering
Mr. Doddridge, and even when the wedding march burst forth and I led her
out of the church. It was as though they had done their best to disguise
her, to put our union on the other-worldly plane that was deemed to
be its only justification, to neutralize her sex at the very moment it
should have been most enhanced. Well, they succeeded. If I had not been
as conventional as the rest, I should have preferred to have run away
with her in the lavender dress she wore when I first proposed to her. It
was only when we had got into the carriage and started for the house and
she turned to me her face from which the veil had been thrown back that
I realized what a sublime meaning it all had for her. Her eyes were
wet. Once more I was acutely conscious of my inability to feel deeply at
supreme moments. For months I had looked forward with anticipation and
impatience to my wedding-day.
I kissed her gently. But I felt as though she had gone to heaven, and
that the face I beheld enshrouded were merely her effigy. Commonplace
words were inappropriate, yet it was to these I resorted.
“Well--it wasn't so bad after all! Was it?”
She smiled at me.
“You don't want to take it back?”
She shook her head.
“I think it was a beautiful wedding, Hugh. I'm so glad we had a good
day.”...
She seemed shy, at once very near and very remote. I held her hand
awkwardly until the carriage stopped.
A little later we were standing in a corner of the parlour, the
atmosphere of which was heavy with the scent of flowers, submitting to
the onslaught of relatives. Then came the wedding breakfast: croquettes,
champagne, chicken salad, ice-cream, the wedding-cake, speeches and more
kisses.... I remember Tom Peters holding on to both my hands.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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