Girton College (University of Cambridge) -- Fiction; Women college students -- Fiction
‘On the contrary, I have thought of myself. I have had a capital
time, Mrs. Arbuthnot--for I have been near you.’ Dinah never looked
more nobly handsome than at this moment. A cold night, passed without
sleep, a greenish-yellow fog, must be fatal adversaries, at 3 A.M.,
to all mere prettiness. Dinah’s beauty could stand alone, without
colouring, without animation. The lines of her head and throat, the
full calm eyelids, the lips, the chin, could be no more shorn of their
fair proportions than would those of the Venus Clytie--should the Venus
Clytie chance to be exposed to the mercy of a Channel fog.
‘You have been near a very stupid person, my lord. I have had too
much heaviness on my heart to talk,’ confessed Dinah. ‘I have scarce
exchanged a dozen words even with Miss Bartrand.’
‘Mrs. Arbuthnot, have you forgiven me?--do, please, drink your coffee
before it is cold--don’t make me feel that I am in your way--boring
you as usual; have you forgiven a horribly foolish speech I made, just
before you disappeared in the darkness, you know?’
‘Which foolish speech?’ asked Dinah Arbuthnot, laconically, but
innocent of sarcasm.
‘Ah, which? I am glad you are good-naturedly inexact. And still,’ went
on Lord Rex, with characteristic straightforwardness, ‘foolish or not,
I meant every word I said. If the woman I loved was free, would look
at me, I should be a changed man, would make my start in the world
to-morrow.’
‘Make your start?’ repeated Dinah, off her guard.
‘Yes. Look after sheep in New Zealand, plant canes, or whatever they
do plant, in South America, and feel that with her, and for her, I was
leading a man’s life.’
And for a moment Dinah Arbuthnot’s pity verged on softness.
Listening to the genuine emotion in Rex Basire’s tone, glancing at
the lad, in his thin drenched jacket, as he stood, holding the salver
ready for her coffee cup, his devotion--by reason, perhaps, of an
unacknowledged contrast--touched her. For a moment, only. Then she
stood, self-accused, filled with a sickening detestation of her own
weakness. That she was more than indifferent, personally, to Rex
Basire, that he would have been distasteful to her in the days when
she was fancy free, the girlish days before she first saw Gaston,
extenuated nothing to Dinah’s sensitive conscience. She had tacitly
condoned the folly of Rex Basire’s talk! Latent in her heart there
must be the same vanity, the same small openness to flattery, which
she had, without stint, condemned in women like Linda Thorne. Was this
self-knowledge a necessary sequel to the abundantly bitter lessons
which the last twenty-four hours had taught her?
‘Do you forgive me, Mrs. Arbuthnot? Speak one word, only. I should
be the most miserable wretch living if I thought I had offended you,
consciously or unconsciously.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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