"Mr. Hirst waits upon you once more to see if you can bid him welcome. It ought to be seriously considered, that your drawing back from him after all that has passed between you, will be to your Prejudice; and will tend to discourage persons of worth from making their Court to you. And you had need well to consider whether you are able to bear his final Leaving of you, howsoever it may seem gratefull to you at present. When persons come toward us, we are apt to look upon their Undesirable Circumstances mostly; and therefore to shun them. But when persons retire from us for good and all, we are in danger of looking only on that which is desirable in them to our wofull Disquiet. Whereas 'tis the property of a good Balance to turn where the most weight is, though there be some also in the other Scale. I do not see but that the Match is well liked by judicious persons, and such as are your Cordial Friends, and mine also. [Footnote 504: Law of 1641: WHITMORE, _Col. Laws of Mass._ (1660-72), 137.] [Footnote 505: DUNTON, _Life and Errors_, I, 103; _idem_, _Letters from New England_, 101, 102.] [Footnote 506: SEWALL'S _Diary_, in 5 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, V, 490.] [Footnote 507: EARLE, _Customs and Fashions_, 57.] [Footnote 508: SEWALL'S _Diary_, in 5 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, V, 491.] [Footnote 509: _Ibid._, 503.] "Yet notwithstanding, if you find in yourself an i[=m]ovable, incurable Aversion from him, and ca[=n]ot love, and honour, and obey him, I shall say no more, nor give you any further trouble in this matter. It had better be off than on. So praying God to pardon us, and pity our Undeserving, and to direct and strengthen and settle you in making a right Judgment, and giving a right Answer, I take leave, who am, dear child, your loving father. Your mother remembers to you."[510] [Footnote 510: SEWALL'S _Letter-Book_, in 6 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, I, 213.] Either this letter had the desired influence or Betty was unable to endure the "wofull disquiet" of a "final leaving;" for a year later it stands written that "Mr. Grove Hirst and Elizabeth Sewall are married by Mr. Cotton Mather."[511] [Footnote 511: SEWALL'S _Diary_, in 5 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, VI, 24. In like spirit the judge manages the marriage of his daughter Mary with Sam Gerrish: SEWALL'S _Letter-Book_, in 6 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, I, 379; _Diary_, in 5 _Mass. Hist. Coll._, V, xxxviii; VI, 250, 251, 263. On these and other illustrations of New England courtship see EARLE, _Customs and Fashions_, 56 ff.] IV. PRE-CONTRACTS, BUNDLING, AND SEXUAL IMMORALITY