A Lady of Quality: Being a Most Curious, Hitherto Unknown History, as Related by Mr. Isaac Bickerstaff but Not Presented to the World of Fashion Through the Pages of The Tatler, and Now for the First Time Written DownBurnett, Frances Hodgson
General
A Lady of Quality: Being a Most Curious, Hitherto Unknown History, as Related by Mr. Isaac Bickerstaff but Not Presented to the World of Fashion Through the Pages of The Tatler, and Now for the First Time Written Down
Burnett, Frances Hodgson
Nobility -- Fiction
Her prayers being at length ended, she had risen from her knees and sat
down, taking a sacred book to read, a book of sermons such as 'twas her
simple habit to pore over with entire respect and child-like faith, and
being in the midst of her favourite homily, she heard the chariot's
returning wheels, and left her chair, surprised, because she had not yet
begun to expect the sound.
"'Tis my sister," she said, with a soft, sentimental smile. "Osmonde not
being among the guests, she hath no pleasure in mingling with them."
She went below to the room her ladyship usually went to first on her
return at night from any gathering, and there she found her sitting as
though she had dropped there in the corner of a great divan, her hands
hanging clasped before her on her knee, her head hanging forward on her
fallen chest, her large eyes staring into space.
"Clorinda! Clorinda!" Anne cried, running to her and kneeling at her
side. "Clorinda! God have mercy! What is't?"
Never before had her face worn such a look--'twas colourless, and so
drawn and fallen in that 'twas indeed almost as if all her great beauty
was gone; but the thing most awful to poor Anne was that all the new
softness seemed as if it had been stamped out, and the fierce hardness
had come back and was engraven in its place, mingled with a horrible
despair.
"An hour ago," she said, "I swooned. That is why I look thus. 'Tis yet
another sign that I am a woman--a woman!"
"You are ill--you swooned?" cried Anne. "I must send for your physician.
Have you not ordered that he be sent for yourself? If Osmonde were here,
how perturbed he would be!"
"Osmonde!" said my lady. "Gerald! Is there a Gerald, Anne?"
"Sister!" cried Anne, affrighted by her strange look--"oh, sister!"
"I have seen heaven," Clorinda said; "I have stood on the threshold and
seen through the part-opened gate--and then have been dragged back to
hell."
Anne clung to her, gazing upwards at her eyes, in sheer despair.
"But back to hell I will not go," she went on saying. "Had I not seen
Heaven, they might perhaps have dragged me; but now I will not go--I will
not, that I swear! There is a thing which cannot be endured. Bear it no
woman should. Even I, who was not born a woman, but a wolf's she-cub, I
cannot. 'Twas not I, 'twas Fate," she said--"'twas not I, 'twas
Fate--'twas the great wheel we are bound to, which goes round and round
that we may be broken on it. 'Twas not I who bound myself there; and I
will not be broken so."
She said the words through her clenched teeth, and with all the mad
passion of her most lawless years; even at Anne she looked almost in the
old ungentle fashion, as though half scorning all weaker than herself,
and having small patience with them.
"There will be a way," she said--"there will be a way. I shall not swoon
again."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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