A Life for a Life, Volume 2 (of 3)Craik, Dinah Maria Mulock
General
A Life for a Life, Volume 2 (of 3)
Craik, Dinah Maria Mulock
Fiction
He soon took care to let me know he was a gentleman--and that, like
many young men of rank and fashion at that time, he was acting Jehu
only “for a spree.” He talked so large, I should have taken him for
a nobleman, or a baronet at least--had he not accidently told me his
name; though he explained that it was not as humble as it seemed,
and expatiated much upon the antiquity, wealth, and aristocratic
connections of his “family.”
His conversation, though loud and coarse, was amusing; and he
patronised me extremely.
I would rather not say a word more than is necessary concerning this
person--he is dead. As before stated, I never knew anything of him
excepting his name, which you shall have by-and-by; but I guessed that
his life had not been a creditable one. He looked about thirty, or a
little older.
When the coach stopped--at the very inn where I am now writing, the
White Hart, Salisbury, he insisted on my stopping too, as it was
a bitter cold night and the moon would not rise till two in the
morning--he said that, I mind well.
Finally, he let the coach go on without us, and I heard him laying a
bet to drive across Salisbury Plain, in a gig, or dog-cart, and meet
it again on the road to Devizes by daybreak next morning. The landlord
laughed, and advised him to give up such a mad, “neck-or-nothing”
freak; but he swore, and said he always went at everything
“neck-or-nothing.”
I can remember to this day nearly every word he uttered, and his
manner of saying it. Under any circumstances this might have been the
case, for he attracted me, bad as I felt him to be, with his bold,
devil-may-care jollity, mixed with a certain English frankness, not
unpleasant. He was a small, dark man, hollow-eyed and dissipated
looking. His face--no, better not call up his face.
I was persuaded to stay and drink with this man and one or two
others--regular topers, as I soon found he was. He appeared poor too;
the drinking was to be at my expense. I was very proud to have the
honor of entertaining such a clever and agreeable gentleman.
Once, watching him, and listening to his conversation, sudden doubt
seized me of what Dallas would think of my new acquaintance, and what
he would say, or look--he seldom reproved aloud--were he to walk in,
and find me in this present company. And, supper being done, I tried
to get away, but this man held me by the shoulders, mocking me, and
setting the rest on to mock me as a “milksop.” The good angel fled.
From that moment, I believe, the devil entered both into him and me.
I got drunk. It was for the first time in my life, though more than
once lately I had been “merry,” but stopped at that stage. This time I
stopped at nothing. My blood was at boiling heat, with just enough of
conscience left to make me snatch at any means to deaden it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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