'You see how easy that makes everything? I want your help, of course; I
told Wilfrid that this was how I should act. It is very simple; let us
say that I prefer to be thought an unselfish woman: anyone can be
jealous and malicious. You are to think that I care as little as it
would seem; I don't yet know how I am to live, but of course I shall, it
will come in time. It was better they should be married in this way.
Then he must come back after the holidays, and everything be smooth for
him. That will be our work, yours and mine, dear aunt. You understand
me? You will talk to Mrs. Birks; it will be better from you; and then
Mr. Athel shall be told. Yes, it is hard for me, but perhaps not quite
in the way you think. I don't hate her, indeed I don't. If you knew that
story, which you never can I No, I don't hate her. I kissed her, aunt,
with my lips--indeed. She couldn't find me out; I acted too well for
that. But I couldn't have done it if I had hated her. She is so altered
from what she was. You know that I liked her years ago. She interested
me in a strange, strange way; it seems to me now that I foresaw how her
fate would be connected with mine. I knew that Wilfrid loved her before
anyone else had dreamt of such a thing. Now promise your help.'
'Have they gone away?' her aunt asked.
'I don't know. It is likely.'
Her face went white to the lips; for a moment she quivered.
'Beatrice, stay with me,' said Mrs. Baxendale. 'Stay 'with me here for a
day or two.'
'Willingly. I wished it. Mrs. Birks is all kindness, but I find it hard
to talk, and she won't let me be by myself. Don't think I am ill--no,
indeed no! It's only rest that I want. It seems a long time since
Sunday. But you haven't yet promised me, aunt. It will be much harder if
I have to do everything myself. I promised him that everything should be
made smooth. I want to show him that my--that my love was worth having.
It's more than all women would do, isn't it, aunt? Of course it isn't
only that; there's the pleasure of doing something for him. And he
cannot help being grateful to me as long as he lives. Suppose I had gone
and told her She would never have married him. She was never beautiful,
you know, and now her face is dreadfully worn, but I think I understand
why he loves her. Of course you cannot know her as well as I do. And you
will help me, aunt?'
'Are you perfectly sure that they have been married this morning?' Mrs.
Baxendale asked, with quiet earnestness.
'Sure, quite sure.'
'In any other case I don't know whether I should have done as you wish.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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