A Little Journey in the WorldWarner, Charles Dudley
General
A Little Journey in the World
Warner, Charles Dudley
American fiction -- 19th century
In Paris Margaret was ill--very ill; and this misfortune caused for
a time a revival of all the old affection, in sympathy with a
disappointment which awoke in our womankind all the tenderness of their
natures. She was indeed a little delicate for some time, but all our
apprehensions were relieved by the reports from Rome of a succession of
gayeties little interfered with by archaeological studies. They returned
in June. Of the year abroad there was nothing to chronicle, and there
would be nothing to note except that when Margaret passed a day with us
on her return, we felt, as never before, that our interests in life were
more and more divergent.
How could it be otherwise? There were so many topics of conversation
that we had to avoid. Even light remarks on current news, comments
that we used to make freely on the conduct of conspicuous persons, now
carried condemnation that took a personal color. The doubtful means of
making money, the pace of fashionable life, the wasteful prodigality
of the time, we instinctively shrank from speaking of before Margaret.
Perhaps we did her injustice. She was never more gracious, never more
anxious to please. I fancied that there was at times something pathetic
in her wistful desire for our affection and esteem. She was always
a generous girl, and I have no doubt she felt repelled at the quiet
rejection of her well-meant efforts to play the Lady Bountiful. There
were moments during her brief visit when her face was very sad, but no
doubt her predominant feeling escaped her in regard to the criticism
quoted from somebody on Jerry Hollowell's methods and motives. “People
are becoming very self-righteous,” she said.
My wife said to me that she was reminded of the gentle observation of
Carmen Eschelle, “The people I cannot stand are those who pretend they
are not wicked.” If one does not believe in anybody his cynicism has
usually a quality of contemptuous bitterness in it. One brought up as
Margaret had been could not very well come to her present view of
life without a touch of this quality, but her disposition was so
lovely--perhaps there is no moral quality in a good temper--that change
of principle could not much affect it. And then she was never more
winning; perhaps her beauty had taken on a more refined quality from her
illness abroad; perhaps it was that indefinable knowledge of the world,
which is recognized as well in dress as in manner, which increased her
attractiveness. This was quite apart from the fact that she was not so
sympathetically companionable to us as she once was, and it was this
very attractiveness of the worldly sort, I fancied, that pained her
aunt, and marked the separateness of their sympathies.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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