He held her in his arms, and a thrill ran through her. Then he lifted
her lovely head and commenced to kiss her, first on her eyes, those eyes
whose sadness had so touched him as she passed him in her brougham--next
on her cheeks, those cheeks whose ideal form had so charmed him from the
first--finally on her sweet mouth, which gave his kisses back. What did
he think of her? How could any idea shape itself in his mind, absorbed
as it was by that union of the lips which is in itself complete and
intoxicating possession? What delight, too, that embrace was to Suzanne!
Through all the horrible complexities of her feminine diplomacy one
sincere desire had grown stronger and stronger within her--that of
meeting with a fresh and spontaneous, natural and thrilling passion.
This passion she found in René's breath; it stirred the very depths of
her soul and made her almost faint with emotion. Ah! this was youth,
with its complete and absolute abandonment, expressing neither thought
nor word; oblivious of all, except the immediate present; effacing all,
except the fleeting sensation whose sweetness and whose very outlines
seem to lie in a kiss.
This woman, corrupted by the influence of a Parisian cynic of fifty and
degraded by that horrible venality which has not the excuse of
necessity--this Machiavelian courtesan, who had regulated her passion
for René like a game of chess--tasted for one second that divine joy.
The punishment of those who let calculation enter into their love lies
in the remembrance of their calculation in the moment of ecstasy. Though
intoxicated by the mad kisses she had given and received, Suzanne
clearly saw that she could not abandon herself at once to her lover's
arms. She therefore broke away from him and said, 'Let me go now that I
have seen you and now that I know you are alive. I beg you to let me go.
O René!'--she had never called him by this name before--'don't come
near me!'
'Suzanne,' replied the poet, maddened by the burning nectar he had found
on those lips--the certainty of being loved--'don't be afraid of me.
When shall we have another hour like this to ourselves? Let me beg of
you to stop. See,' he added, receding still farther from her, 'I will
obey you. I obeyed you even when I found it so very hard. Ah! you
believe me now!' he exclaimed, seeing that Suzanne's face no longer
expressed such intense fear. 'Will you be very nice?' he continued, in
that playful tone which takes so well with women, and which will make
any one of them, be she a lady of high degree or a simple girl, call a
man a 'darling.' 'Sit down there in that arm-chair, where I have so
often sat at work, and then be nicer still, and try to look as though
you were not on a visit.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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