Had Suzanne not been his mistress he would never have dared to speak to
her as he did, nor would she have allowed it. 'But how?' he asked
himself; 'she never received him at home, or I should have known it
through Paul. She did not see him out; he goes nowhere.' Once more he
repeated, 'I have been an ass!' and felt really angry with the woman who
was the cause of his perturbation. He had just passed the Café de la
Paix and had to brush aside two women who accosted him in their usual
shameless manner. 'Bah!' he exclaimed; 'they are all alike.' He walked
on for a few paces and saw that he had let his cigar go out. He threw it
away with a gesture of impatience. 'And cigars are like women.' Then he
shrugged his shoulders as it occurred to him how childishly he was
behaving. 'Frédéric, my dear fellow,' whispered an inner voice, 'you
have been an ass, and you are continuing the _rôle._' He took a fresh
cigar from his case, held it to his ear as he cracked it, and went into
a cigar-shop for a light. The havana proved to be delicious, and the
Baron, a connoisseur, thoroughly enjoyed it. 'I was wrong,' he thought;
'here is one that is not a fraud.'
The soothing effect of the cigar changed the tenour of his ideas.
He looked about him and saw that he had almost reached the end of the
boulevard. The pavement was as crowded as at midday, and the carriages
and cabs went hurrying by. The gas-lamps glinted upon the young foliage
of the trees in a fantastic manner, and on the right the dark mass of
the Madeleine stood out against the dark blue sky studded with stars.
This Parisian picture pleased the Baron, who continued his reflections
in a calmer frame of mind. 'Hang it all!' he cried; 'can it be that I am
jealous?' As a rule he shook his head whenever he was treated to an
example of that mournful passion, and would generally reply, 'They pay
your mistress attentions! But that is merely a compliment to your good
taste.' 'I, jealous! Well, that would be good!'
When we have accustomed ourselves to play a certain part in the eyes of
the world for years together we continue to play it even when alone.
Desforges was ashamed of his weakness--like an officer who, sent out on
a night expedition, blushes to find himself afraid and refuses to admit
the presence of that feeling. 'It is not true,' he said to himself; 'I
am not jealous.' He conjured up a vision of Suzanne in René's arms, and
it tickled his vanity to feel that the picture, though not a pleasant
one, did not cause him one of those fits of intense pain that constitute
jealousy. By way of contrast, he recalled the poet's entry in the box,
his agitated manner, and the unconquerable frenzy that betrayed itself
in every lineament. There you had a really jealous man, exposed to the
full fury of that terrible mania.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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