Adultery -- Fiction; French fiction -- 19th century
These visits gave Chazel an uncomfortable feeling; he experienced a
vague impression that he was in the way in his own house. He had several
times remarked when it was he himself who interrupted a _tête-à-tête_
between Armand and his wife, that the conversation suddenly ceased on
his arrival; he recognised this by the brightness in Helen's eyes. On
such occasions, that he might not give way to the vexation which he
felt, he used to engage in those already mentioned abstract
disquisitions. He saw that his old comrade had become more of a friend
to his wife than to himself, he was hurt by it, he reproached himself
for feeling hurt, and by the mere fact that he reproached himself,
reflected about it.
He thus grew accustomed continually to unite the thoughts of his friend
with that of his wife. But when we depict to ourselves simultaneously
the images of two living persons, it is not long before we depict them
acting upon each other, and in spite of himself Alfred came to consider
the relations which united Armand to Helen. To ascertain the cause of
his wife's suffering he had proceeded by elimination, instinctively
studying as a problem the data that he possessed concerning her, and
every time that he dwelt upon the mystery, he always struck upon a
thought which he used to drive away, and which came back again. At other
times he asked himself whether she had not confided the reason of her
grief to De Querne, was on the point of questioning his friend, and then
abstained from doing so.
"It would not be delicate," he thought to himself; "if she says nothing
to me, she has her reasons for it."
One day, however, he saw her so pale, so downcast, that he took courage.
"You are suffering, Helen," he said; "will you find a better friend than
I am to whom to confide your troubles, whatever they may be?"
"Nay, I have no troubles," she had replied, and she spoke falsely once
more.
Why were her eyes then filled with that moisture which speaks of
suppressed tears? Ah! it was because the loving kindness of her husband
was a torture to her in her torture, were it only by its contrast to the
frigidity of another man, the memory of whom was then passing through
her heart. Why did the same memory pass at the same moment through
Alfred's imagination? She, however, kept this memory before her mind,
while he repelled it.
"Helen," he said to himself, "is an honourable woman. Armand is an
honourable man. What right should I have to insult them with suspicion?
He takes an interest in her; did I not desire that it should be so? She
is attached to him--and why not? Can there not be honourable friendship
between a man and a woman?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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