Adultery -- Fiction; French fiction -- 19th century
He sank into the easy chair as though exhausted by the emotions that he
had just experienced. His agitated face revealed too clearly the
excessiveness of his grief, and Armand felt unspeakably moved by looking
upon such a spectacle of sorrow and weakness. By truthfulness of soul,
Alfred had just re-established between them the true nature of the
situation. Husbands are not so often ridiculous, as the proverb says,
but by reason of the deceived vanity which is at the bottom of nearly
all their bitterness, or of the triumphant vanity which is at the bottom
of their fancied security. But Alfred, face to face with Armand, was
trust face to face with treachery, serious love, ready for the most
tragic sacrifices, face to face with the depraved fancy of pride and
sense that scruple had restrained.
And Armand was silent. Alfred's affection and esteem smote him as with a
hand. Ah! how he would have liked to have said to this man:
"Yes, I have lied to you. I have robbed you of your wife. I had the
excuse that I did not know how much you loved her and how much you loved
me. Choose now the reparation that it may please you to require, and I
will grant it you. Let us put an end to it."
Yes, but what of Helen? The secret of adultery does not belong to a
single individual. To his duty towards Alfred was opposed another
duty--a duty of honour also, and one freely contracted--and he was
silent, feeling a very child in the presence of this honesty which
suffered and wept before him, honesty possibly deceived and certainly
simple. But a man who entrusts you with his pocket-book, and whom you
rob of the bank-notes in one of the pockets of it, is also deceived and
simple; only, on the other hand, you are a thief. Whatever Armand's
superiority to Alfred might be, he found himself, by the mere fact of
his own treachery and his friend's good faith, in that condition of
humiliation which is intolerable to all higher natures. It was an
experience that lasted for only a few minutes, but it was a very bitter
one.
"Do not pay any attention to this complaining of mine," Alfred resumed;
"my nerves are unstrung. I really do not know why I am like this, seeing
that I have found with you the certainty that I needed. Ah! thank
you!"--and he sprang forward to kiss his friend as brother kisses
brother. Under this kiss Armand could feel the blood rising to his face.
"Come," he said in confusion, "calm yourself."
"Nay, I am calm," said Alfred; "you have been so good, you have listened
to me with so much heart. Alas!" he added mournfully, "how is it that I
cannot have an explanation with Helen like that which I have had with
you? In her presence I feel so embarrassed, so constrained."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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