I could offer little else than Mark Twain's
memorable diary on shipboard: "Got up, washed, and went to bed." She
must come back, that is all. I don't know where she is, nor how long she
will be away. These things I will find out. Here I have wandered on much
like a maundering old man, without first setting down the adventure of
the day, and then commenting, if so inclined. I beg pardon. To-night I
really am not fit, and should not attempt to write. But I have begun;
inaction would be galling, so I will continue.
Was I astir early this morning? The first gray arrow, barbed with silver
and feathered with gloom, had not found my small window ere I was up
with a snatch of song welling from my throat, and hurrying for the big
washtub back of the kitchen which does the duty of a bathtub in
civilization. I had never been so completely happy since I was a boy on
my grandad's farm. I even wanted to whistle while I was shaving, I was
so full of song and laughter. Cooking breakfast was a jolly lark; eating
it a delicious pastime. Then I was gone like a deer breaking cover, the
door to the Lodge open to its fullest extent. She knew the truth, and I
might even meet her coming to me.
As I ran easily through the forest on the now familiar way, I noticed
that my exuberant spirits began to decline. A foreboding of some
disaster crept stealthily and steadily upon me, until I actually had a
chilly sensation down my spine, and a woeful sinking in my breast. This
phenomenon, in common with many others attendant upon our daily life,
cannot be explained. I really suffered until I came in sight of the roof
which sheltered my beloved; then, as I mounted to the tree-bridge with
feet suddenly grown leaden, a numb calm gripped me. I stood and leaned
against the section of the root-wadded disk which projected above the
butt of the oak, little spiders of feeling scurrying out all over my
chest from a center above my heart. No signs of morning activity greeted
my despairing gaze. The house was silent and lifeless as the trunk
beneath my feet. No blue wood smoke curled up from the kitchen chimney.
Not even the dog was visible. Only from the comb of the chicken house a
lonesome guinea fowl squawked harshly. I dragged myself forward. When I
reached the house I went in a mechanical way to each door and window in
turn. They were fastened, but I discovered the dining room window was
without a shade or curtain, and to a pane of glass here I pressed my
face, shielding my eyes from the light with my hands. Slowly the
interior took shape. A table covered with oilcloth; a few low-backed,
shuck-bottomed chairs; a smaller table against the wall holding what
appeared to be a jar of honey; a safe with tin paneled doors stuck full
of holes in some kind of design; a fly-brush in the corner made of
newspaper slit into strips and fastened to the end of a piece of bamboo
fishing-pole. A bare floor, well scrubbed. I saw no one; I heard
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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