A Portrait of the Artist as a Young ManJoyce, James
General
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Joyce, James
Artists -- Fiction; Autobiographical fiction; Bildungsromans; Dublin (Ireland) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
The second pain which will afflict the souls of the damned in hell is
the pain of conscience. Just as in dead bodies worms are engendered by
putrefaction, so in the souls of the lost there arises a perpetual
remorse from the putrefaction of sin, the sting of conscience, the
worm, as Pope Innocent the Third calls it, of the triple sting. The
first sting inflicted by this cruel worm will be the memory of past
pleasures. O what a dreadful memory will that be! In the lake of
alldevouring flame the proud king will remember the pomps of his court,
the wise but wicked man his libraries and instruments of research, the
lover of artistic pleasures his marbles and pictures and other art
treasures, he who delighted in the pleasures of the table his gorgeous
feasts, his dishes prepared with such delicacy, his choice wines; the
miser will remember his hoard of gold, the robber his illgotten wealth,
the angry and revengeful and merciless murderers their deeds of blood
and violence in which they revelled, the impure and adulterous the
unspeakable and filthy pleasures in which they delighted. They will
remember all this and loathe themselves and their sins. For how
miserable will all those pleasures seem to the soul condemned to suffer
in hellfire for ages and ages. How they will rage and fume to think
that they have lost the bliss of heaven for the dross of earth, for a
few pieces of metal, for vain honours, for bodily comforts, for a
tingling of the nerves. They will repent indeed: and this is the second
sting of the worm of conscience, a late and fruitless sorrow for sins
committed. Divine justice insists that the understanding of those
miserable wretches be fixed continually on the sins of which they were
guilty, and moreover, as saint Augustine points out, God will impart to
them His own knowledge of sin, so that sin will appear to them in all
its hideous malice as it appears to the eyes of God Himself. They will
behold their sins in all their foulness and repent but it will be too
late and then they will bewail the good occasions which they neglected.
This is the last and deepest and most cruel sting of the worm of
conscience. The conscience will say: You had time and opportunity to
repent and would not. You were brought up religiously by your parents.
You had the sacraments and grace and indulgences of the church to aid
you. You had the minister of God to preach to you, to call you back
when you had strayed, to forgive you your sins, no matter how many, how
abominable, if only you had confessed and repented. No. You would not.
You flouted the ministers of holy religion, you turned your back on the
confessional, you wallowed deeper and deeper in the mire of sin. God
appealed to you, threatened you, entreated you to return to Him. O,
what shame, what misery! The Ruler of the universe entreated you, a
creature of clay, to love Him Who made you and to keep His law. No. You
would not. And now, though you were to flood all hell with your tears
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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