'That was not a great deal, after all. It was a fair price, perhaps,
but less than the house and ground were worth. The interest of that
does not cover the greater outlay here.'
This was very dismayful, all the more because Colonel Gainsborough did
not come out frankly with the whole truth. Esther was left to guess
it,--to fear it,--to fancy it more than it was, perhaps. She felt that
she could not have things left in this in indeterminate way.
'Papa, I think it would be good that I should know just what the
difference is; so that I might know how to bring in our expenses within
the necessary limits.'
'I have not cyphered it out in figures. I cannot tell you precisely how
much my income is smaller than it used to be.'
'Can you tell me how much we ought to spend in a week, papa?--and then
we will spend no more.'
'Barker will know when I give it to her.'
The colonel had finished his tea and toast, which this evening he
certainly did not enjoy; and went back to his book and his sofa.
Though, indeed, he had not left his sofa, he went back to a reclining
position, and Esther moved the table away from him. She was bewildered.
She forgot to ring for Barker; she sat thinking how to bring the
expenses of the family within narrower limits. Possible things
alternated with impossible in her mind. She mused a good while.
'Papa,' she said, breaking the silence at last, 'do you think the air
suits you here?'
'No, I do not. I have no cause.'
'You were better at Seaforth?'
'Decidedly. My chest always feels here a certain oppression. I suppose
there is too much sea air.'
'Was not the sea quite as near them at Seaforth, and salt air quite as
much at hand?' Esther thought. However, as she did not put entire faith
in the truth of her father's conclusions, it was no use to question his
premises.
'Papa,' she said suddenly, 'suppose we go back to Seaforth?'
'Suppose nonsense!'
'No, sir; but I do not mean it as nonsense. I have had one year's
schooling--that will be invaluable to me; now with books I can go on by
myself. I can, indeed, papa, and will. You shall not need to be ashamed
of me.'
'You are talking foolishly, Esther.'
'I do not mean it foolishly, papa. If we have not the means to live
here, and if the Seaforth air is so much better for you, then there is
nothing to keep us here but my schooling; and that, as I tell you, I
can manage without. And I can manage right well, papa; I have got so
far that I can go on alone now. I am seventeen; I am not a child any
longer.'
There was a few minutes' silence, but probably that fact, that Esther
was a child no longer, impelled the colonel to show her a little more
consideration.
'Where would you go?' he asked, a trifle drily.
'Surely we could find a place, papa. Couldn't you, perhaps, buy back
the old house--the dear old house!--as Mr. Dallas took it to
accommodate you? I guess he would give it up again.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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