have the more we crave; and when we burn or wound ourselves by our own
obstinacy or carelessness, we are ungratefully prone to blame the
Supreme Benefactor for our own faults. We don black mourning robes as a
sort of sombre protest against Him for having removed some special
object of our choice and love, whereas, if we believed in Him and were
grateful to Him, we should wear dazzling white in sign of rejoicing
that our treasure is safe in the land of perfect joy where we ourselves
desire to be. Do we suffer from illness, loss of money, position, or
friends, we rail against Fate--another name for God--and complain like
babes who have broken their toys; yet the sun shines on, the seasons
come and go, the lovely panorama of Nature unrolls itself all for our
benefit, while we murmur and fret and turn our eyes away in anger.
Thinking of these things and kneeling before the altar, my heart became
filled with gratitude; and no petition suggested itself to me save one,
and that was, "Let me believe and love!" I thought of the fair, strong,
stately figure of Christ, standing out in the world's history, like a
statue of pure white marble against a dark background; I mused on the
endurance, patience, forgiveness, and perfect innocence of that most
spotless life which was finished on the cross, and again I murmured,
"Let me believe and love!" And I became so absorbed in meditation that
the time fled fast, till a sudden sparkle of flame flashing across the
altar-steps caused me to look up. The jewelled cross had become a cross
of fire. The point of light I had been, told to watch for had not only
touched the extreme edge, but had crept down among all the precious
stones and lit them up like stars. I afterwards learned that this
effect was produced by means of a thin, electric wire, which,
communicating with a timepiece constructed on the same system,
illuminated the cross at sunrise, noon, and sunset. It was time for me
to join Heliobas. I rose gently, and left the chapel with a quiet and
reverent step, for I have always thought that to manifest hurry and
impatience in any place set apart for the worship of the Creator is to
prove yourself one of the unworthiest things created. Once outside the
door I laid aside my veil, and then, with a perfectly composed and
fearless mind, went straight to the Electrician's study. I shall never
forget the intense quiet of the house that morning. The very fountain
in the hall seemed to tinkle in a sort of subdued whisper. I found
Heliobas seated at his table, reading. How my dream came vividly back
to me, as I saw him in that attitude! I felt that I knew what he was
reading. He looked up as I entered, and greeted me with a kindly yet
grave smile. I broke silence abruptly.
"Your book is open," I said, "at a passage commencing thus: 'The
universe is upheld solely by the Law of Love. A majestic invisible
Protectorate governs the winds, the tides.' Is it not so?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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