PALMER. Forsooth, this life I did begin To rid the bondage of my sin: For which these saints rehearsed ere this I have both sought and seen, i-wis; Beseeching them to bear record Of all my pain unto the Lord, That giveth all remission, Upon each man's contrition; And by their good mediation, Upon mine[369] humble submission, I trust to have in very deed For my soul health the better speed. PARDONER. Now is your own confession likely To make yourself[370] a fool quickly. For I perceive ye would obtain No other[371] thing for all your pain, But only grace your soul to save: Now mark in this what wit ye have! To seek so far, and help so nigh; Even here at home is remedy; For at your door myself doth dwell, Who could have saved your soul as well; As all your wide wandering shall do, Though ye went thrice to Jericho. Now since ye might have sped at home, What have ye won by running[372] at Rome? PALMER. If this be true that ye have moved, Then is my wit indeed reproved. But let us hear first what ye are? PARDONER. Truly I am a pardoner. PALMER. Truly a pardoner! that may be true; But a true pardoner doth not ensue. Right seldom is it seen, or never, That truth and pardoners dwell together, For be your pardons never so great, Yet them to enlarge ye will not let With such lies that ofttimes, Christ wot, Ye seem to have that ye have not. Wherefore I went myself to the self thing In every place and without saying: Had as much pardon there assuredly, As ye can promise me here doubtfully. Howbeit, I think ye do but scoff:[373] But if ye had all the pardon ye speak[374] of, And no whit of pardon granted In any place where I have haunted: Yet of my labour I nothing repent; God hath respect how each time is spent; And as in his knowledge all is regarded, So by his goodness all is rewarded. PARDONER. By the[375] first part of this last tale, It seemeth ye came of late[376] from the ale. For reason on your side so far doth fail, That ye leave reasoning,[377] and begin to rail. Wherein you[378] forget your own part clearly, For you[379] be as untrue as I: And in one point ye are beyond me, For you[380] may lie by authority, And all that have[381] wandered so far, That no man can be their controller. And where you[382] esteem your labour so much, I say yet again my pardons are[383] such, That if there were a thousand souls on a heap, I would bring them to heaven as good cheap.[384] As ye have brought yourself on pilgrimage, In the least[385] quarter of your voyage, Which is[386] far a side heaven, by God: There your labour and pardon is odd. With small cost and without any pain, These pardons bring[387] them to heaven plain; Give me but a penny or two pence, And as soon as the soul departeth hence, In half-an-hour, or threequarters at the most, The soul is in heaven with the Holy Ghost. 'POTHECARY. Send ye any souls to heaven by water? PARDONER. If we do,[388] sir, what is the matter?