FRIAR. We for your sins do both sob and weep-- PARDONER. Wherefore now, in the name of the Holy Ghost-- FRIAR. To pray to God for mercy and for grace-- PARDONER. I advise you all, that now here be-- FRIAR. And thus do we daily with all our whole place-- PARDONER. For to be of our fraternity-- FRIAR. Wherefore distribute of your temporal wealth-- PARDONER. Fie on covetise! stick not for a penny:-- FRIAR. By which ye may preserve your souls' health-- PARDONER. For which ye may have benefits so many-- FRIAR. I say, wilt thou not yet stint thy clap? Pull me down the Pardoner with an evil hap! PARDONER. Master Friar, I hold it best To keep your tongue, while ye be in rest-- FRIAR. I say, one pull the knave off his stool! PARDONER. Nay, one pull the friar down like a fool! FRIAR. Leave thy railing and babbling of friars, Or, by Jis, I'sh lug thee by the sweet ears![176] PARDONER. By God, I would thou durst presume to it!-- FRIAR. By God, a little thing might make me to do it-- PARDONER. And I shrew thy heart, and thou spare-- FRIAR. By God, I will not miss thee much, thou slouch; And if thou play me such another touch, I'sh knock thee on the costard, I would thou it knew-- PARDONER. "Marry that I would see, quod blind Hew." [177] FRIAR. Well, I will begin, and then let me see, Whether thou darest again interrupt me, And what thou would once to it say-- PARDONER. Begin and prove, whether I will, yea or nay-- FRIAR. And to go forth, whereas I left right now-- PARDONER. Because some percase will think amiss of me-- FRIAR. Our Lord in the gospel showeth the way how-- PARDONER. Ye shall now hear the Pope's authority. FRIAR. By Gog's soul, knave, I suffer thee no lenger-- PARDONER. I say some good body lend me his hanger, And I shall him teach by God Almighty, How he shall another time learn for to fight! I shall make that bald crown of his to look red; I shall leave him but one ear on his head! FRIAR. But I shall leave thee never an ear, ere I go: PARDONER. Yea, whoreson friar, wilt thou soe-- [_Then they fight_. FRIAR. Loose thy hands away from mine ears-- PARDONER. Then take thou thy hands away from my hairs; Nay, abide, thou whoreson, I am not down yet; I trust first to lay thee at my feet. FRIAR. Yea, whoreson, wilt thou scrat and bite? PARDONER. Yea, marry, will I, as long as thou dost smite.-- [_Enter the Curate_. PARSON (OR CURATE). Hold your hands, a vengeance on ye both two, That ever ye came hither to make this a-do! To pollute my church, a mischief on you light! I swear to you, by God Almight, Ye shall both repent, every vein of your heart, As sore as ye did ever thing, ere ye depart. FRIAR.