A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 14
General
A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Volume 14
English drama
_Enter_ PARSON _and_ WANTON.
WAN. Was she deaf to your report?
PAR. Yes, yes.
[_The_ PARSON _walks troubled up and down_.
WAN. And Ugly, her Abigail, she had her say too?
PAR. Yes, yes.
WAN. And do you walk here, biting your nails? do you think I'll
be satisfied with such a way of righting me?
PAR. What wouldst have me do?
WAN. Have you no gall? be abused and laughed at by a dull
captain, that a strict muster would turn fool! You had wit, and
could rail when I offended you; and none so sudden, none so
terrible, none so sure in his revenge, when I displease you.
PAR. Something I'll do.
WAN. Do it, then, or I shall curse that e'er I saw you. Death!
let the sign of my lady, an out-of-fashion whore, that has paid
for sin ever since yellow starch[222] and wheel fardingales were
cried down, let her abuse me, and say nothing: if this passes----
PAR. As Christ bless me, but I did, sweet heart; and if it were
not church livings are mortal, and they are always hitting me in
the teeth with a man of my[223] coat, she should find I am no
churchman within, nor Master Parson but in my coat. Come to
dinner, and after dinner I'll do something.
WAN. I shall do something will vex somebody.
_Enter_ BAWD.
BAWD. Will you please to come to dinner? the company stays.
PAR. Come, let's go in.
WAN. No, I must walk a little to digest this breakfast; the
guests else will wonder to see I am troubled.
PAR. Come, let this day pass in mirth, spite of mischief, for
luck's sake.
[_Exit_ PARSON.
WAN. I'll follow you, and do what I can to be merry.
BAWD. Why, he stands already.
WAN. Peace, let me alone: I'll make him jostle like the miller's
mare, and stand like the dun cow, till thou may'st milk him.
BAWD. Pray break him of his miserableness; it is one of the chief
exceptions I have against him. He reared a puppy once, till it
was ten days old, with three hap'worth of milk, and then with his
own dagger slew it, and made me dress it: blessed myself to see
him eat it, and he bid me beg the litter, and swore it was
sweeter and wholesomer than sucking rabbits or London pigs, which
he called Bellmen's issue.
PAR. [_Within._] Why, sweet heart!
WAN. Hark! he calls me. We must humour him a little, he'll rebel
else.
SCENE VII.
_Enter (at the windows) the_ WIDOW _and_ MASTER CARELESS,
MISTRESS PLEASANT _and_ MASTER WILD, CAPTAIN, MASTER SAD,
CONSTANT, JOLLY, SECRET: _a table and knives ready for
oysters_.
WID. You're welcome all, but especially Master Jolly. No reply
with, _I thank your ladyship_.
PLEA. I beseech you, sir, let us never be better acquainted?
[_She speaks to_ MASTER JOLLY.
JOLLY. I shall endeavour, lady, and fail in nothing that is in my
power to disoblige you; for there is none more ambitious of your
ill opinion than I.
PLEA. I rejoice at it; for the less love, the better welcome
still.
WID. And as ever you had an ounce of love for the widow, be not
friends among yourselves.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account